Lie To Me
by Maddielmo
Summary: Conflict arises when Edward and Bella leave for college. Will they survive the obstacles? Please read to find out. Disclaim: do not own Twilight series or characters. They are property of Stephanie Meyer.
1. Leaving

**Disclaimer: I do no own the Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, or Breaking Dawn books. They and they characters mentioned in this book are the creation of Stephanie Meyer. I also do no own any of the songs lyrics that made be mentioned in this story. **

Chapter 1: Leaving

I loaded the very last of my boxes into the back of my faithful, cherry truck. Edward had insisted, practically begged, to buy me a brand new car. He even tried to compromise with me. He said he'd buy me a brand new red truck with an excessively fast engine. I had declined to that as well. I loved my old clunker. It had been with me since the beginning of Forks and it was sort of a memento for me and the best years of my life.

Fall had, once again, come to Forks and it was time for school to start. More specifically, it was time for college to start. I was headed up to Alaska to attend the University of Alaska. I'd say I was excited, but that would be a lie. Going to college was not my idea; it was Edward and Charlie's. It was one of the only… no it _was_ the only thing they ever agreed on.

Edward, Alice, and Jasper had already packed up and moved their stuff to Anchorage. In fact; the whole Cullen family had decided it was time to leave. They bought a nice house about ten minutes outside the city. It was similar to the one they had in Forks, only it was larger and more beautiful. I didn't think that was possible.

The house was closer to the Denali clan who were often considered their extended family. It was also close enough to the university that I could spend a lot of time with my future family. My dad made sure that I had my own dorm room of course; he even came up to Alaska to check the status of the rooms. It surprised me how much effort my dad was putting in to the whole college thing. Although, I can't blame him; it _was _college and I _was _moving out of the house. It was probably just an incentive to have as much time with me as he could.

Charlie and I took the road trip up to Anchorage on our own. It was awkward at first, being alone with my father. He wasn't one to show emotion but we had a great time. We played car games and stopped at little cafes along the way.

Edward met us there, thinking it would be good for Charlie and I to have alone time. After we arrived in Anchorage, I thanked Edward whole heartedly. It was a good idea and I know Charlie appreciated it. We, Edward and I, both knew how much Charlie cringed at the thought of me and Edward. He was still trying to get over the whole 'leaving' episode.

However, things between Edward and I had become strained over the last couple of months. I wanted him to change me into a vampire as soon as we graduated, but he was unwavering on the whole idea. He was insistent on me staying human for as long as possible. At least until I married him _and_ I had experienced all that college had to offer. He had a lot of requests out of me and it was all because he loved me. I knew that but I didn't care whether or not I had these experiences but he did. I felt bad about it all because I had been fighting him the whole time. We couldn't seem to reach a compromise on the whole situation so I decided I'd play his way for awhile before I brought it up again. Sort of like a reward for good behavior. Maybe he'd be more willing to consider my pleas.

I took a step away from my truck and turned around to face the house. I drew in a deep breath as I stared up at my room. So many memories I wanted to savor. To remember all the times Edward came in through my window and even the time that Jacob came in to make me guess his clandestine.

I sighed… Jacob. I was going to miss him the most about Forks. He was the one thing I wanted to pack up and take with me the most. He was my best friend and I wasn't sure how I'd handle things without him. The only good thing about leaving is that Edward and Jacob couldn't fight anymore. The more I hoped they'd come to an understanding, the more I realized I was doing so in vain.

The sound of a car broke me from my thoughts. It was a car I was particularly familiar with and belonged to Jacob. It was his Rabbit that he had fixed up himself. He was so proud of the little thing, just like I was proud of my broken down Chevy. It was mine and maybe that's why Jacob loved his little car.

Jacob pulled up into the drive way and got out. His size always took me by surprise. He was so tall and muscular and looked more like 25 then 18. He was beautiful but telling him that would open up a can of worms that I had vowed to keep shut and never open again. Besides, I loved Edward in every way and nothing could ever change that.

Jacob shut the door and walked towards me. "Looks like you're all packed up. I was hoping I'd get here in time to help you finish. A lot of good I am."

"Yeah I know but I didn't really have that much to pack."

"Well, I still wanted to help. Anyway, I brought you a going away present."

He took a small square object out of his pocket and handed it to me. It looked like it was wrapped in the dark… or like he ran over it. I couldn't help but laugh at the sight of it. He gave me my favorite smile as I attempted to open the package. There was a lot of tape on it.

I was apparently taking too because he grabbed my present out of his hands. "Here, let me."He had the wrapping paper off in one swift motion.

"Sometimes it pays to be a werewolf." He chuckled and handed me my present. It was a CD that he had mixed.

"Those are all my favorite songs. There's a huge variety. There some rock songs and some punk songs. I think there's even a soft song for my sensitive side." He laughed again; the way he did before he turned into a werewolf. He was _my _Jacob for that brief moment.

"Thanks Jake, this means so much. I am going to miss you." I wrapped my arms around his waist as he picked me up in a bear hug.

"I'm going to miss you too Bells. It won't be the same without you here."

"Yeah, I know what you mean," I sighed. I wanted to ask Jacob if he would come visit me but I knew the answer before asking. He had enough trouble being around Edward. Asking him to be around the Cullen's _and_ the Denali clan would be like asking him to walk through fire. It would be too hard for him, so I decided not to ask. Instead, I would come visit him and Charlie. That way neither Charlie nor Jacob would have to come and see my vampire life.

"I'll come visit you a lot okay? I wouldn't forget you, not ever. You're my best friend Jacob."

"Aww… you're mine too Bells. Don't worry about Charlie either, he's in good hands."

"Thanks Jake. I guess I better get going. I'm supposed to stop by the police station and tell Charlie bye before I head over to the Cullen's."

"You'll call too right Bella?"

"Of course I will. I'll talk to you soon. Bye Jacob."

"Bye Bells."

I gave him one last hug before I turned to get into my truck. I sat in the cab and watched Jacob get into his car to leave. He turned to look at me as he pulled out of the driveway. He mouthed the words 'love you' and waved goodbye. I mouthed back the words and pulled away from the house; taking one last glance. I was going to miss this house. This was the house where my life had really begun and I was sad to be leaving it.

I took the CD out of the clear case and put it into the CD player. Edward was true to his words and replaced the stereo before Jasper and Emmett had seen the first one I ripped out. The first song was fast and had a great edge to it. I smiled as I drove down the road towards the police station. The song screamed Jacob. I was thankful that he had given the CD to me. It honestly felt like it could be the soundtrack to Jake's life.

_Degenerates – Scary Kids Scaring Kids_

_Do you think you're made of gold? • Invincible? • You think you can handle it? • You will learn from this. • I'm telling you friend • this is something worth fighting for. • Does it not seem contradicting • to sit back and watch them take more? • Caught like a deer in their headlights you're stuck now. • You're bound by your fear • I suggest you break free or • you'll forever be damned here. _

_Chorus:  
We are merely degenerates waiting for you to • come sweep us off of our feet! They keep marching on • spilling blood like savages. • Taking lives while your cigarette burns._

You can't tell me my friend • that that wasn't worth dying for. • Gave it all and received nothing •  
may as well have let them take more. • Dig deep, find the courage to speak • are you really still bound by your fear? • This is all just a dream now • you can't speak and you're damned here. 

_chorus._

This is our fight for freedom • this is our way of saying •this is our day.

We've been waiting for this one day all our lives • this nothing short of predictable. • Stop holding your head down give it up! • Get a hold of yourself now. • Or give is up! • Your like a deer in the headlights, • you've given up! • To save your life.  
(repeat)

_Find the will to save your life!_


	2. The Goodbye

**Disclaimer: I do no own the Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, or Breaking Dawn books. They and they characters mentioned in this book are the creation of Stephanie Meyer. I also do no own any of the songs lyrics that made be mentioned in this story. **

**Also, the links for the songs are on my profile page so you can get a feel for the mood I wanted to get across. **

Chapter 2: The Goodbye

I pulled into the parking lot and parked by Charlie's cruiser. I wasn't ready for this conversation. I had deliberately left this good-bye for last. I knew it was going to be the most painful. Charlie hardly showed his emotions but the emotions he had about me leaving were ones he was okay with showing. He even cried a little bit while I was packing my things up.

I finally found enough composure to drag myself out of the truck. I walked at a snail's pace into the station; I wasn't in a hurry. Charlie must have heard my truck pull up because he was waiting by the door. He grabbed me up in a tight hug.

"There you are Bella!" He bellowed. "I've been telling all the guys here about your plans."

"It's true, we know your whole life and what all you want to do." I didn't recognize the man who said it but I figured it didn't matter. He did give me a pleasant smile so he couldn't be all that bad.

"This," Charlie said, "Is my partner Conner. I didn't get a chance to introduce him to you before."

I stuck out my hand to him. "Nice to meet you," I said.

"You too kid. Well I better get back to my desk. Good luck Bella."

"Thanks," I said with a smile.

Conner left Charlie and me to stand there alone for a long, silent minute. He then looked at me and smiled as he ushered me outside. He sat down on the steps and patted the concrete for me to join him. I sat down beside him and let out a sigh.

"I guess it's time for you to meet up with the Cullen's, huh?"

"Yeah," I sighed again. "They'll want to leave soon."

"It will be nice to have the whole Cullen family close to you. I won't worry so much." He looked at me with a sheepish grin, he always worried.

I smiled at him, "I'm not going to do anything rash dad. I'll probably be with the Cullen's more than anything. I'll be fine."

"I know you will but I still worry."

I knew Charlie would worry; there was never a doubt in my mind about that. I was happy that he didn't have to worry so much since the Cullen's were going to be ten minutes away.

"I got you a little present. Let me go grab it, I forgot it on my desk."

He was up and running into the building for I had a chance to answer. I looked out towards the small town of Forks. There were people walking around, enjoying the nice weather and little stores. I really was going to miss it here but I'd have fun in Alaska. It'd be cold but hopefully I'd get acclimated pretty fast.

I turned around to see Charlie coming through the door with a gift bag. I wasn't surprised; he was never good at wrapping. Throwing something in a bag was something he could do though. He handed me the bag with an elated smile on his face.

"I hope you don't have it."

I pulled out a little book from the bag that looked as though it had seen many years. The cover was worn down and the binding was fraying at the end. I didn't have the book but I had read it before. It was 'Lord of the Flies' and was one of my favorites. I opened the cover and found two inscriptions. The first read:

_To my son,_

_May you do great things with your life and always remember where it is that you came from. Don't forget those who have given you everything and never take the little things for granted. Your mother and I are proud of you and know you will be successful. We love you son.  
Love,  
Your Father_

The second inscription was from Charlie.

_To my Bells, _

_I am very proud of you. You have succeeded in so many ways and I know you have a wonderful life in front of you. I am behind you in all you do and will always be here. I love you honey.  
Love,  
Your Father_

"My father gave it to me when I moved out of the house to live on my own. I know you'll do great Bella; you always have. And know that I'll be behind you no matter what you do. I love you kiddo."

"I love you too dad. Thank you, it's perfect."

A tear had started to roll down my face while I read the inscription that my dad and grandpa had written in the book. I wrapped my arms around him and squeezed as tightly as I could. I stepped back and wiped away the tears.

"I'll call you when I get there," I said.

"Please do. And Bells?"

"Yeah dad?"

"Stay close."

I ran lunged forward and wrapped my arms around Charlie again. This was more heartbreaking then I had anticipated. It was excruciating saying goodbye to Charlie, my little town of Forks, everything. I already missed my life and especially Jake and Charlie. I turned to walk away but stopped. I turned back and stood up on my tiptoes to give Charlie a kiss on the cheek. I smiled at him as I came back down on my heels.

"Bye dad, I love you."

"Love you to Bells. Bye."

I walked towards my truck and hesitated by the door. I turned around to look at him one more time before I headed to Edward's. There was a tear on his cheek while he waved to me. I hopped up into the seat and started the engine. The truck roared to life and Jacob's CD started back up. It was one of the softer songs that he said he had on it. Another tear ran down my cheek as I left Forks and headed to Edward's.

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_Your Call – Secondhand Serenade_

_Waiting for your call, I'm sick • call, I'm angry • call, I'm desperate for your voice. • I'm listening to the song we used to sing in the car. • Do you remember, butterfly, early summer? • It's playing on repeat... • Just like when we would meet._

_Chorus:  
'Cause I was born to tell you I love you, • and I am torn to do what I have to, • to make you mine. • Stay with me tonight._

Stripped and polished, I am new, I am fresh. • I am feeling so ambitious; you and me, flesh to flesh. • Because every breath that you will take • while you are sitting next to me • will bring life into my deepest hopes. • What's your fantasy? • What's your, what's your, what's your, what's your...

chorus

And I'm tired of being all alone, • and this solitary moment • makes me want to come back home. • (I know everything you wanted isn't anything you have.) •

chorus


	3. The Drive

**Disclaimer: I do no own the Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, or Breaking Dawn books. They and they characters mentioned in this book are the creation of Stephanie Meyer. I also do no own any of the songs lyrics that made be mentioned in this story. **

**Also, the links for the songs are on my profile page so you can get a feel for the mood I wanted to get across. **

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Chapter three: the Drive

The Cullen house was completely bare of their possessions. There was no longer a sense of being as I walked into the house. It felt like my room; it was no longer a place to call home, just like Forks. Without the Cullen's and all the furniture, it truly felt like it was just another house. It was depressing to say the least. I sighed as I walked into the house. I touched the wall where there was once a family picture hanging. Edward came up behind me and wrapped his cold arms around me.

"I'm going to miss this place Edward. There are so many wonderful memories here."

"I'm going to miss it too but it won't be that bad because I'll have you," he said.

"You're so sweet Edward, and always know exactly what to say." I stood up on my tiptoes and wrapped my arms around his neck. "I love you," I whispered and placed a soft kiss upon his cold lips.

"Are you ready to leave now?" Edward asked when I let my lips depart from his.

"Yes, I think so."

"Alright, I'm going to go tell Jasper and Alice we're ready."

"Okay," I replied.

I turned around to face the living room and smiled, remembering the time I slept over. Alice and I watched movies all night with Rosalie. The best part was when the boys snuck out of the room and tried to scare us. They succeed in scaring me, but that's not anything hard to do. I chucked as I remembered Emmett dressed in leaves trying to stay camouflaged in the woods. Jasper had remarked at how fortunate he was to have Emmett as a brother, otherwise he wouldn't have anything to be humiliated of. This statement sent Emmett flying towards Jasper and crashing him into a tree, taking it down with them. Their wrestling match lasted the rest of the night while we all watched with much anticipation as to the outcome. Jasper won.

"I'm looking forward to new memories," I said to myself quietly. I missed the rest of the Cullen's already, even though they had only been gone for a couple of days. They had moved up all of their furniture to the new home. Everything would be set up and in place when we got there. Alice and Jasper stayed behind to ride up with Edward and me. I wasn't exactly sure how we were all going to fit into my truck but Alice swore it would work so I had no reason to distrust her. I never doubted Alice.

Alice had our whole road trip planned out. She found some car games on the internet that she wanted to play. They all sounded crazy to us but there was no way we were going to get out of playing the games; it would've of hurt her feelings. She kept giving us the guilt trip that she's never had the chance to play car games before. We had no other choice but to play when she said that.

We ended up having a great time with her games. Even Jasper joined in on the fun, which surprised me. He always seems so serious, but maybe that's because I'm still human and he's still working on control. I must admit though that I was proud of how far he had come since he tried to attack me. He felt so bad about the incident that he tried his hardest to improve his control every chance he got. I appreciated that the most today because he was sitting beside me in a tightly packed truck. Alice was sitting on his lap so that could've been helping him with control too.

I let Edward drive for a couple of reasons. One is that I loved watching the scenery and another is that Edward always complained when I drove the speed limit. I decided I didn't want to fight him on the issue of driving so I let him. I knew he was having trouble handling my truck though. It wasn't going nearly fast enough for him. He loved to push 150 in his Volvo and my truck barely made it to 80. He mumbled a lot to himself but I thought it was adorable so I didn't say anything.

Due to Alice's games, the time passed quickly for us. My favorite game was the alphabet game. We unanimously picked the category of movie names because it sounded like a challenge. I could've sworn though that Jasper and Edward were cheating and making up names of movies.

"I'll go first," Alice sang. "A is for _Annie_. Now it's your turn Bella."

"Okay, A is for _Annie_ and B is for _Bad News Bears_."

"Oh I love that movie! Okay Jasper it's your turn," Alice said.

"A is for _Annie_, B is for _Bad News Bears_, and C is for _Can She Bake a Cherry Pie_?"

I busted up laughing, "That is so not a movie!"

Jasper laughed too, "Yes it is, I promise. I have it in my collection."

"Fine," I said, "but you have to show me soon."

Next it was Edward's turn. He repeated our answers and then stated, in a matter of fact tone, "D is for _Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid."_

"You guys are totally cheating now!" I yelled in a fit of laughter.

The game continued in this fashion with Jasper and Edward trying to think of the most ridiculous movie titles. Some I had heard of but most I thought for sure that they were lying about. I decided that when I got home and had my computer set up, I'd look up some of the movies to make sure they weren't cheating us.

We eventually pulled into the Cullen's new drive way. The house was just as striking as I had imagined. It was open and light just like their old house in Forks. It took my breath away. There was a beautiful meadow and their entire property was surrounded by a forest that was so lush and stunning. I knew the meadow wouldn't always be green… most of the time it'd be covered in snow, but still… I could enjoy it for awhile.

Edward grabbed me by the hand and helped me out of the truck. He kept a hold of my hand as we walked up the steps to their new home. It was just as dazzling on the inside of the house as it was on the outside. The living room was the size of the whole first floor almost. There was also a kitchen, a bathroom, and a master bedroom. The grand staircase was located beside the kitchen and led the way up to two more stories. Esme had already decorated the house and arranged the furniture the way she wanted it and it was absolutely brilliant. She was so good at interior decorating and I made a mental note to ask her to do Edward and I's house when or if we ever got our own.

We didn't have to stand in the living room alone too long before Esme and Carlisle came and greeted us. They were followed by Emmett and Rosalie. I said hello to everyone and gave them all hugs. I think Emmett missed me the most because he picked me up and twirled me around.

"Bella!! I'm so glad you're here. I haven't had anyone to laugh at in two days."

"I'm glad I can be your amusement Emmett," I smiled at him. He was defiantly my favorite Cullen brother.

After he set me back down I looked at Rosalie. "Hi Rosalie, how've you been."

"Good, thanks." She gave me a little smile and I couldn't have asked for anything more from her. She was trying it seemed so I returned the smile to her.

I then turned to Esme and decided I'd comment on how lovely her house was.

"The house is gorgeous Esme, I love how you decorated," I said.

"Thank you Bella, but you haven't seen the best part. Would you like to show her Edward?"

I looked up at Edward and saw a he was wearing a cunning grin on his face. He nodded once at Esme and picked me up in his arms. He took off towards the stairs at an inhuman speed because my speed apparently wouldn't have been fast enough in this instance. Before I knew it we were on the third floor. There was a bathroom and two bedrooms where as the second floor held four bedrooms and two more bathrooms. All together there were four bathrooms and seven bedrooms in the house. It was much bigger than the house in Forks. I assumed they needed this many for their guests when they came to visit.

Edward put me down when we got to the top of the stairs. He took my hand and walked me into one of the bedrooms. It was an average sized bedroom with Edward's stuff already in it. It was a little bigger than his room in Forks and there were still windows everywhere. What was different is that there wasn't a bed. There was just his couch, his dresser, his entertainment center, etc. I was a little disappointed that the bed wasn't in his room anymore but I had my dorm room so why would I need a bed here at the Cullen's.

"Wow Edward," I said. "Your room looks exactly the same, minus a few details." I could tell that he sensed the cynicism in my voice because he smiled his crooked smiled that I loved.

"Yeah well I haven't had a chance to decorate it myself. Esme just did it the way I had it back home so don't worry, I'll spruce it up."

"That makes sense I guess."

"So do you want to see what Esme was talking about?"

"You mean the 'best part' of the house?"

"Yeah," he grinned. He took my hand once again and walked me out of his room. Across the hall from him was another room with a blue door. I thought that was odd but for all I knew, Esme was trying some form of creativity out.

"Close your eyes," Edward said as he leaned in and whispered in my ear. My knees went weak as I felt his cool breath on my neck. He gave me a light kiss as he reached for the door knob.

"Close your eyes please," he whispered.

I finally closed my eyes. I heard the door open and a scent of fresh flowers blasted through the doors and hit me at full force. I drew in a deep breath, "That smells wonderful."

"Open your eyes Bella," he said.

I did… my breath was taken away. On the other side of the door was the most beautiful room I had ever seen. The walls were light blue, Edward's favorite color. He said that color blue always went well with my skin tone.

I took a step into the room and looked around. There was a large, white bed in the center of the room with a white canopy. In the center of the room there was a black rustic chandelier with blue and white crystals. Sporadic pots of flowers were placed in various parts of the room which explained the overwhelming scent of freesia, roses, and lilacs. There were also a dozen of different colored pillows all over the floor. **(picture found on profile)**

"It's beautiful," I breathed. "Whose room is this?"

"It's your room Bella. Esme wanted to give you something special for your graduation present."

"She gave me my own room?" I was blown away, I had no idea how much Carlisle and Esme thought of me as part of their family.

"She knows you'll spend most of your time here instead of on campus and she wants to make sure you have somewhere you can actually relax."

"Oh Edward… I have to go see her." Before I even turned around, Esme was standing behind me.

"Do you like it," she asked? I detected a worried expression on her face. I felt a twinge of guilt for a moment remembering how I'd reacted with presents from Esme and Carlisle in the past. I'd been trying to work on that though.

"I love it! It's absolutely perfect. Thank you so much, you don't know how much it means to me."

"Bella," she stated, "you are family now. This home is yours just as much as it is ours. We want you to feel welcome."

I smiled and gave her a big hug. She turned and headed back down the stairs as Edward picked me up and carried me into my new room.

"Well Mrs. Swan, how do you like your room?"

"I told you I loved it. I wasn't lying."

"I love that you're learning to accept gifts."

"Me too, I know how happy it makes you."

My phone suddenly started ringing. I looked down at the id and noticed that it was Charlie's number. Edward set me back down on my feet and gave me a kiss on my forehead. I answered the phone while I watched Edward walk around the room, observing all the details Esme had put into my new room. He was patient throughout the whole conversation with Charlie. He kept me talking for about 15 minutes; wanting to know about the ride up here and what Edward's new house was like. I left out the part about my new room at the Cullen's house because I didn't want there to be any reason for Charlie to come and drag me back down to Forks.

After I got off the phone with Charlie, I asked Edward if I could call Jake just to let him know I got here okay. He nodded that it was okay and I hurriedly typed Jacob's number. He answered on the first ring, not that I would've expected anything different. He was always so worried. Jake and I's conversation only lasted a few minutes because he had to get back to work with Sam. I told him I'd e-mail him later and then hung up.

I walked over to my new dresser and set my phone down. Edward came up behind me and swept his arms under my legs to pick me up. I sighed deeply as Edward carried me over and laid me on my new bed. Tomorrow I'd be moving into my dorm room and the following day we'd be starting college. I didn't ever want to get out of bed… just laying there in his arms; I was content and I felt safe.

"I love you," I whispered. He kissed my hair as he said, "I love you to Bella."

I fell asleep in his arms and dreamed of him and me together. I knew nothing could ever destroy us or at least I hoped so…

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_"Movin' Right Along" – The Muppets_

Movin' right along in search of good times and good news, • With good friends, you can't lose,  
This could become a habit. • Opportunity knocked once, let's reach out and grab it, • Together we'll nab it. • We'll hitch-hike, bus, or yellow cab it.

Movin' right along, foot-loose and fancy free. • Gettin' there is half the fun; come share it with me. • Movin' right along (doog-a-doon, doog-a-doon) • We'll learn to share the load. • We don't need a map to keep this show on the road.

Movin' right along we found a life on the highway, • And your way is my way, so trust my navigation. • California here we come, that pie-in-the-sky land. • Palm trees and warm sand, though sadly we just left Rhode Island.

Movin' right along, hey, L.A., where've you gone? • Send someone to fetch us, we're in Saskatchewan. • Movin' right along (doog-a-doon, doog-a-doon) • You take it, you know best. • Hey, I've never seen the sun come up in the West.

Movin' right along, we're truly birds of a feather, • We're in this together, and you know where you're goin'. • Movie stars with flashy cars and life with the top down. • We're stormin' the big town. • Yeah! Storm is right, should it be snowin'?

Movin' right along, do I see signs of men? • Yeah, "welcome" on the same post that says "come back again." • Movin' right along, foot-loose and fancy free. • You're ready for the big time, is it ready for me?

Movin' right along • Movin' right along • (repeat to fade)


	4. Shaken

**Disclaimer: I do no own the Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, or Breaking Dawn books. They and they characters mentioned in this book are the creation of Stephanie Meyer. I also do no own any of the songs lyrics that made be mentioned in this story. **

**Also, the links for the songs are on my profile page so you can get a feel for the mood I wanted to get across. **

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Chapter Four: Shaken

When I woke up, the sun had already started to go down behind the clouds. I sighed deeply, inhaling the breathtaking aroma that covered me. I turned around to face Edward and smiled. His eyes were close but there was a smile on his face as well.

"What are you smiling about?" I asked him as I wrapped my arms around him.

He opened his eyes and pulled me closer to him.

"You talk in your sleep," he said fluidly.

"You already knew that," I told him as I rolled my eyes.

"Yeah, but it was what you said while you were sleeping."

"Oh," I groaned. I don't even remember dreaming but since he wasn't mad, it couldn't of been that bad. "What did I say?"

"You said you loved me," he replied with a huge grin on his face.

"That's because I do love you Edward, more than anything." I planted a kiss on his lips and sighed heavenly. "Your kisses are delicious."

He laughed and said, "Speaking of delicious, it's time we get up."

"Aw… Why?" Right at that moment, as if my body was answering my own question, my stomach growled.

"That's why," Edward said with a laugh.

"I guess that means it's time to feed the human," I answered, noticing the look Edward gave me.

He sat up, swung his feet around, and got off the bed. "Esme fixed you something; Chicken Alfredo I think."

"That sounds amazing. I'll be right down okay?"

Edward leaned down and kissed me on the lips. It had been a few hours since we kissed so my hormones were sent into overdrive as I wrapped my arms around him, pushing my lips against his. After about three seconds of me flinging myself at him, he pulled away with a sheepish grin.

I told him I was sorry for getting carried away and he gave me that look that said, 'I know you aren't but your still forgiven'. I smiled at him as I watched him walk out the door and down the stairs.

I got off the bed and looked around at my new room. My eyes stopped on the closet. Even though I hadn't unpacked any of my clothes yet, I had a sick feeling that the closet wouldn't be empty.

I walked towards the closet slowly, almost like I walking to my death. I closed my eyes and opened the door. I knew this act was futile because there was no way Alice would miss an opportunity like this. So with a deep breath I decided to open my eyes, one at a time.

"Alice." I grumbled.

I heard a pixie laugh from somewhere in the house. Can't say that I was surprised, she wouldn't miss this opportunity like I said. She had, however, been generous and bought me a lot of normal clothes. They were as normal as designer clothes can get anyway. So I walked into the huge closet, and found a cute zip-up hoodie.

"Thanks Alice," I said knowing that she'd hear me.

"You're welcome," I heard back.

I put on my hoodie and headed towards the staircase where I was met by Edward.

"Dinner's done, you look cute," he said as he looked at my new sweatshirt.

"Thanks."

"You're welcome. You hungry?"

"Starved!" I blurted out, not really meaning to say with such force. I didn't want to give away how hungry I really was. He smiled at my outburst though and reached out for my hand. I gave him mine and we walked down the stairs with each other. I knew that my 'human-pace' wasn't even a tenth of his speed but he never seemed to mind keeping pace with me.

"I thought I'd go hunting with Jasper and Alice since we're going on campus tomorrow. Is that okay?" he asked.

"Of course it is. I'll be fine. I wanted to spend some time with Emmett anyway."

"I'm sure he'd like that," Edward said.

We finally made it to the kitchen where Esme was. As I set down at the island, she handed me a large plate of food.

"Wow Esme, this looks great!"

"Thanks but Emmett helped," she said modestly.

I turned to look at him as he was coming through the front door.

"You cook?" I asked with a hint of skepticism in my voice.

"Yeah," he said. "I'm a master of the grill."

I took a bite of the chicken and found he was right. The chicken tasted amazing. I'd never tasted anything like it before. It's what I imagined I'd taste if I ever had the chance to go to a prestigious, five-star restaurant.

"Oh my gosh Emmett, this is amazing!" I gasped.

"Told you," he said with a smug look on his face. "So you wanted to watch a movie or something?"

"Yeah," I said after I chewed my food, "your choice."

He grinned widely and raced off to the living room. I watched him sift through movies as I ate the rest of my food. After I was done I hopped off the bar stool and headed to the sink to wash my dishes. I was suddenly surrounded by Edward's cold arms. His cool breath was on my neck and it sent shivers down my spine. It was more than I could take.

I turned to face him and stood up on my tiptoes so I could kiss him. My lips melded to his and once the kiss started to get passionate, he pulled away. 'Right on cue' I thought.

Edward took a step back and smiled his crooked smile. Alice and Jasper came down the stairs and stood beside him a few seconds after that.

"Are you ready to go Edward?" Alice chimed

"Yeah," he said to Alice. He turned to me again and pulled me into a hug.

"I'll be back tomorrow morning. Have fun with Emmett." He leaned closer to my ear and whispered, "be safe," knowing that if there was anything dangerous nearby, I would find it.

"I will," I responded.

"I'll see you soon. I love you," Edward said to me.

"I love you to."

He placed one last kiss on my lips then turned to Jasper and Alice. As if on some hidden signal, they left at the same time and were out of the room with only a gust of wind left behind.

I headed over to the living room and plopped down on the sofa beside my favorite Cullen brother. He had a wonderful ability of making me feel like we were one and the same. I never felt like just a human with him. He wasn't constantly reminding me of my weaknesses and he loved having fun, regardless of the possibility of danger. Not to say that he didn't worry about me, he just wasn't as fanatical. This is why I loved spending time with Emmett. He was my brother and would be for as long as I was concerned.

"So which movie did you pick?" I asked Emmett.

"I picked a classic," he said excitedly.

"What's that?" I asked.

"Dracula, the original. Ironic isn't it?" He said as he raised he brows up and down.

"You're twisted," I said, "but I haven't seen that version in years so push play."

"What a sport," he said as he nudged my side.

I fell asleep somewhere in the middle of the movie with my head on Emmett's shoulder. At the end he carried me up to my room and placed me in my bed. I barely remembered seeing him tuck the covers around me. I told him 'thanks' as he turned out the light and shut the door.

In the morning I was woken up by Edward setting down at the foot of the bed. I sat up and looked at him. He looked nervous and distant.

"What's wrong Edward?" I crawled to the end of the bed and put myself in his lap. "Did something happen while you were hunting?"

It appeared that he was in some sort of a daze. He wasn't responding to anything I said or did. It was on the third time that I said 'Edward' and shook his shoulders that he looked down at me. He was unquestionably troubled about something.

"What's wrong Edward?" I asked again, hoping for some response.

"Nothing's wrong," he replied. He response was cold and lifeless. His eyes weren't the liquid, golden color that they usually were. Instead, they were solid and dark. I couldn't see any flicker of emotion in them.

Why had he just lied to me, it was extremely evident that there was something acutely wrong. There was one other time that he was in a trance similar to this and it was after my birthday party; the party where Jasper attempted to attack me after I had a paper cut. I was worried now. What had happened while he was gone? What did this all mean?

He forced a smile and wrapped his arms around me. "We have to get ready to go. It's a big day for you." His voice trembled as he spoke, the only form of emotion that I had seen in the last few minutes.

"Yeah, it is." I said feebly. Today wasn't going to be a good day.

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_Shaken – Shiny Toy Guns_

_Running in circles • Chasing pain • Of yesterday • Shaken...fearful • Because I've come • Back for what is trouble • Still..._

Chorus:

_I will wait it out • I will wait it out • I will wait it out • I will not be shaken_

Strange calls to meet those • Who feel and know • How to give up • The stage lights • And heroes • Razor pain • Rubbed it all away, love • Still

_Didn't notice it right away • Didn't notice it until it was too late • I'm gonna change my desire • For your all consuming fire • Didn't wanna cry out at night • Didn't wanna stop at mid flight • I didn't plan for the fall • When I was running from it all..._

Have I no evil • Citizen Cain • Slowed-- my desperate running • Still....


	5. Moving In

**Disclaimer: I do no own the Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, or Breaking Dawn books. They and they characters mentioned in this book are the creation of Stephanie Meyer. I also do no own any of the songs lyrics that made be mentioned in this story. **

**Also, the links for the songs are on my profile page so you can get a feel for the mood I wanted to get across. **

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Chapter Five: Moving IN

The drive to campus was long and difficult; most of the time it was quiet though. I kept stealing glances at Edward. He wasn't lifeless anymore. Instead, he appeared to be trying very hard to act normal; whatever normal is for a vampire anyway. I could tell that he was putting on a front but I couldn't find a way to break through the barricade. It wasn't just Edward that was acting weird, Alice was as well. This whole silent scene was becoming increasingly annoying.

I took the opportunity from Edward's silence to text Jake. I told him I'd e-mail him last night but I fell asleep instead during the movie.

"What are you doing?" Edward asked, breaking me from my thoughts.

"Texting Jacob, although he's probably doing his rounds," I replied.

Edward just nodded in response, indicating only that he heard me and did not care about what it was that I actually said. I decided to continue talking about Jacob since I don't get to talk about him a lot. Talking about Jacob made it feel like there was no clandestine, mythical war of vampires and werewolves. It also felt like there was no clash between Edward and Jacob; like he was any other friend I had and was able to talk about freely without relentless glances from Edward.

"Yeah, I told him I'd e-mail him last night but I fell asleep during the movie. He's probably going crazy right about now," I joked.

"Yeah," was all Edward said. My eyebrows pulled together in concern. Edward never missed a chance to called Jacob a derogatory name referring to his species. Usually the names mutt, pup, and dog were thrown in whenever his name came up. I decided that this ruse had gone on long enough and Edward was going to tell me what he was so shaken about.

"Edward," I said.

"Hmm?" He replied.

"Why won't you tell me what's wrong?"

"Because nothing is wrong."

I was getting angry now.

"Then why is Alice acting the same way?" I had to confront him. I had to find out what the heck was going on.

I continued, "You've hardly said anything to me since you've gotten back and you have this remote look on your face. Alice is acting the same way so tell me what the heck is going on and don't lie to me."

I was absolutely livid by the time my tirade was over and it showed. Edward didn't answer me till we pulled onto campus and into a parking space in front of my dorm.

He turned to face me as he said, "Nothing happened, we just met someone while we were hunting, that's all."

"Was it another vampire? That doesn't sound like a big deal to me." I was trying to keep my voice even so he would continue without thinking I was angry, but I still was. I saw no reason why meeting another vampire could shake both Alice and Edward to their core.

"Yes, she was another vampire."

"Was she from the Denali clan?"

"No, she's a nomad that feasts on animal blood as well. She's coming over tonight to meet the family."

"Why are you so upset about all of this? Is there something wrong with her?" I asked. To tell the truth, I was a little concerned. Another female vampire in the house, who I assumed to be gorgeous as all vampires were, was going to be hard.

"I'm not upset; I just didn't get to hunt enough. I'm sorry. Can we please just drop this so we can move you in? This is supposed to be a day all about you." He leaned over and kissed me, briefly raising the butterflies in my stomach and easing my worries about whatever he was hiding. When his lips left mine, he eyes had turned back into the liquid, gold color that I was used to. It was as if this morning hadn't happened. He smiled his crooked smile and turned to face Alice that had appeared at his door.

"Are we ready?" Alice asked. It looked like her mood had improved too. Jasper was opening my door when I noticed a calm wave sweep over me.

"Thanks," I said quietly. I had a feeling he'd understand the double meaning of the thank you for opening the door and calming me without Edward and Alice knowing. I saw him nod out of the corner of my eye. I raised my head up to his in order to look at him. I saw that there was an expression I hadn't seen on Jasper's face before, it almost looked like there was pain mixed into his perfect features. I didn't have time to scrutinize the expression any further because he slipped a note into my hand. I looked down at it and noticed it said "we need to talk" in Jasper's tidy writing

"Later," was all he said and I nodded putting the note in my pocket.

Moving my belongings in to my new dorm was easy. I didn't have a lot to move in since I wouldn't be there most of the time. I unpacked my clothes, toiletries, school stuff, a new laptop that I bought with my money from working at the Newton's, and my bedspread set from home. There was also some other knick-knacks that I decided to bring like pictures, books, etc. Jasper volunteered to go with me to buy the books I needed for my classes after about an hour of work. He, Alice, and Edward already had their books waiting for them at home. They paid extra to have them sent to their house ahead of time.

Alice said she was going to go through all the clothes while I was gone. She wanted to put all the ones that were out of style into a bag to take to the community shelter downtown. I didn't object since she had bought me clothes to replace the ones she would be getting rid of and that they were all going to a shelter downtown. Edward said he'd stay behind as well and help Alice decorate everything.

Jasper and I walked down to the bookstore with about a foot of space in between us. We walked in silence for awhile, till I decided I should break the silence somehow.

"Thanks for coming with me," I said.

"You're welcome," he said with a smile. His brows then furrowed and I could tell he was debating on whether to say something or not.

"Is something bad going to happen Jasper?" I asked hesitantly.

"I don't know." He started to speak in a low voice, so I had to close the distance between us to get nearer to him. It looked as though I scared him when I moved by him, but then he put his arm around my shoulder and bent his head closer to my ear. "What I do know is that when we were hunting, things changed. We ran into this girl and when she left Alice saw a vision she's not telling me. Edward knows of course but he won't tell me either. After the vision, Edward said we had to go and they took off towards home. "

I sighed and closed my eyes. "What do you think it means?"

"Well that's what I wanted to tell or at least warn you. Their feelings are dependent on you."

"Wait… Are you saying you think this whole thing is about me?"

"Yes, I think so anyway. They act fine unless they're around you and then they are worried or sad or confused. I don't know how to explain it, but something is definitely up."

We arrived at the bookstore now and our conversation turned less somber and cryptic. I had about six, thick books when I left the store but Jasper offered to carry them for me. I didn't want to bring up our previous conversation, but things were bugging me. I debated on whether or not to just spit it out or wait. I decided I'd ask one question and then based on the answer; I'd either keep asking questions or stop worrying.

"Jasper, do you think that Edward and I's relationship is in trouble?"

"No," he said hesitantly, "but I think letting this girl in our home is a bad idea."

I nodded my head in agreement and ended our conversation.

When we got back to the room, Edward was waiting for me on my bed. There was a Wendy's bag sitting beside him.

"I thought you'd be hungry," he stated.

He was right. I had forgotten to eat breakfast with all the commotion. I ate my cheeseburger quickly and looked around the room. It was almost done. There was just one personal touch I needed to add to the room. I walked over to my purse and pulled out the picture that I had taken with Edward back on my sixteenth birthday. We were standing in my living room and it was the first picture we had taken to together.

Renee had sent me a picture frame for my graduation present along with a few other things. I thought it was the perfect frame for our first picture and I wanted it at my dorm room so I could admire it at all times. I placed the frame on my desk and looked at the picture of us. I was pale in contrast to him as usual but his beauty never ceased to amaze me. The smile on his face was my favorite and everything about the picture was perfect. I turned with a smile to face Edward. The mental comparison to the picture and they way he looked sitting on my bed was heartbreaking. He didn't seem like my Edward at all today.

My smile quickly faded and I felt a tear brim to the surface of my eye. I quickly brushed the tear away and headed towards the door with Edward close behind me.

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_(the lyrics are really long so I'm going to put the lines that convey the feeling in this chapter)_

_Actions and Motives – 10 Years _

_You're fooling no one but yourself • But yourself • I wish you well • Oh what tangled webs we weave • When we practice to deceive_


	6. Siren

**Disclaimer: I do no own the Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, or Breaking Dawn books. They and they characters mentioned in this book are the creation of Stephanie Meyer. I also do no own any of the songs lyrics that made be mentioned in this story. **

**Also, the links for the songs are on my profile page so you can get a feel for the mood I wanted to get across. **

**Lastly… please, please, please review. I like knowing what's going on in your heads so I know if I'm making things interesting. :) **

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Chapter Six: Siren

Tears threatened to surface during the ride home. I had to distract myself in order to keep the tears from brimming over. I noticed that I hadn't checked my phone since I texted Jacob. I rummaged through my purse and pulled it out. I smiled seeing Jacob had texted me back.

"How's Alaska? Bet your freezing. Probably wish I was around to keep you warm, huh?" Jacob texted.

I quickly wrote back, "Yeah, I wish you were here too. Not to cold though. I'll call you soon :)"

I closed my phone and sighed, remembering how life was good a day ago and now it felt like my world might be crashing down at any moment.

The house was quiet when the four of us walked in. Edward had a hold of my hand; a little to tightly. It alarmed me. I looked at his faced and he looked longingly at me. It was like he hadn't seen me in weeks.

He tugged on my hand, pulling me into his arms. "I love you," he whispered.

At that time, a beautiful, brunette vampire walked in the door. She was as gorgeous as I was afraid she was. She glowed with a bright aura of self-confidence and every step she took closer to us felt like she was dancing or creating art. _Rosalie is not going to like her I thought._

"Hello Edward, nice to see you again," she said. Her voice was musical; everything about her reminded me of the Sirens that tempted Odysseus.

"Hello," he replied.

She looked down at me after hearing his response with a skeptical look on her face.

"This is Bella," Edward said.

"Hello Bella," the said the Siren from nightmares.

I nodded to her, showing my hello back. I forced a smile out, knowing that if I didn't I wouldn't be using the manners my mother taught me when I was three. _Stupid manners. _

"Bella," Alice said, placing her hand on my shoulder, "Esme needs you in the kitchen. Oh hello Lizzy."

I tried to watch Edward and Alice as they spoke to the new vampire, whose name was apparently Lizzy. They didn't seem to be as hostile as they were this morning about her.

Edward loosened his grip on me and guided me to the kitchen; Alice stayed behind and introduced Lizzy to the rest of the family. I stole a look at Jasper as I walked towards the kitchen. He met my eyes and smiled a grim smile that I knew wasn't good. I had a feeling that Jasper knew more then I thought.

Esme was in the kitchen with her head in the fridge. "What did you want for dinner honey?" She asked.

I smiled to myself. "I'll just have leftovers from last night. I'm not all the hungry." Esme didn't need to go to all the trouble of cooking something when I wouldn't eat much to begin with.

She got out the container with the pasta and put it on a plate. She handed me my dinner after she heated it up for me. I took a bite while Edward sat down in the seat beside me. He was still tense and staring at Lizzy. I would've been jealous if he wasn't glaring at her like she broke every album in his music collection.

"So… you going to tell me about it?" I didn't see the point in beating around the bush anymore.

"About what?" It was usually cute when he acted innocent but that was not this time, this game, or lie should I say, was getting old.

"Alice's vision."

"You know about that?"

"It's not hard to guess." I spared Jasper's involvement.

"Hmm… I guess not." He finally turned to face me. "Okay. Alice saw a vision of something happening and I'm just trying to prevent."

"Does it involve Lizzy?"

"I don't know, Alice didn't see who it was."

"Then why were you giving her the death eye?"

He sighed, "I always get tense when new vampires, regardless of their diet, come near you."

I realized that I wasn't going to get any more information about this Lizzy so I dropped it. I also knew he was right. He did act the same way when Peter and Charlotte came to visit Jasper.

"So," I said. "What time do your classes start tomorrow? Mine start at 10."

"I signed up for morning classes that start at 7:30. It's still dark then so it'll be easier. Are you excited about your classes?"

"Yeah," I sighed, "a little."

"Good," he replied and then continued to watch me eat dinner.

I finished eating I got up to wash my dishes. Edward stuck by me the whole time, never leaving my side. We walked into the living room and sat on the couch, across from Lizzy. She seemed nice enough but I still had a feeling Jasper was right when I looked at his expression.

At 10, Edward went upstairs with me and sat on the bed while I got ready. When I was done, he scooped me up in his arms and carried me to the bed. He tucked me in with a blanket separating me from his cold body. He wrapped his arms around me and hummed me to sleep.

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_Lullaby – The Spill Canvas_

_It's the way that you blush when you're nervous. • It's your ability to make me earn this. • I know that you're tired, • Just let me sing you to sleep. • It's about how you laugh out of pity, • 'Cause let's be honest, I'm not really that funny. • I know that you're shot, • Just let me sing you to sleep._

_Chorus:_

_If you need anything, • Just say the word, I mean anything. • Rest assured, if you start to doze, • Than I'll tuck you in, • And plant my lips where your necklaces close._

_It's those pills that you don't need to take; • Medicating perfection, now that's a mistake. • I know that you're spent, • Just let me sing you to sleep. • It's your finger and how I'm wrapped around it. • It's your grace and how it keeps me grounded. • I know that you're weak, • Just let me sing you to sleep._

_Chorus_

_While you were sleeping, • I figured out everything: • I was constructed for you, • And you were molded for me. • Now I feel your name, • Coursing through my veins. • You shine so bright, it's insane. • You put the sun to shame._

_Chorus_


	7. The Game

**Disclaimer: I do no own the Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, or Breaking Dawn books. They and they characters mentioned in this book are the creation of Stephanie Meyer. I also do no own any of the songs lyrics that made be mentioned in this story. **

**Also, the links for the songs are on my profile page so you can get a feel for the mood I wanted to get across. **

**Lastly… please, please, please review. I like knowing what's going on in your heads so I know if I'm making things interesting. :) **

--------------------------------------------------------

Chapter Seven: The Game

Waking up in Edward's arms never ceased to comfort me. Despite the coldness of his skin, I always woke up warm and content.

I turned to face him and planted a kiss on his cheek. He smiled a little; it was obvious he was still distressed about Alice's vision. He let me go so I could go tend to my human needs but not before he squeezed me tightly.

I shuffled to the bathroom, grabbing clothes on the way. Stealing a glance at the clock as I passed, I noticed the time; it was 6:30.

"Ugh… it's so early," I groaned.

I heard Edward chuckle as I shut the bathroom door and put on the jeans, t-shirt, and sweatshirt that Alice had bought me. I wasn't sure how cold it was outside, but I knew just a t-shirt wouldn't do.

Edward was standing in front of the window when I came out of the bathroom.

"Sun won't be up for another three hours. Make sure you're wearing enough layers." He turned to face me, "Do you have long underwear?"

I nodded and went back into the closet to get them. Edward was still in front of the window, his fingers raking through his hair, when I came out of the bathroom for the second time.

I came up behind him and snaked my arms around his waist.

"Where's your head at?" I asked softly.

He placed his hands on mine; grasping them tightly. He pulled my arms away from his waist and turned to face me.

"I'm thinking about you."

"What are you thinking about?"

"I'm just worried about your first day. You are very accident-prone love." His mouth twisted into a small smirk.

No matter how much a front he tried to put on, I knew he was still hiding something from me. I felt like he was pushing me away, little-by-little.

Instead of saying what I really wanted to about' why he was doing this' and 'why he just didn't tell me', I said, "You're hilarious," in a very monotone voice.

I knew Edward being away from me would be hard for him but it'd be hard for me as well.

"I'll be home by one. It'll be fine, I promise." Standing on my tiptoes, I embraced Edward's lips into mine for a passionate kiss.

All too soon he pulled away; sooner then usual. The feeling of rejection was beginning to surface and was getting harder and harder to push down.

"Are you ready to go?" He asked.

"Yes," I said as I fought back the fear rising in my gut. We headed downstairs to my truck.

"Maybe we should drive separate, since we get done with class at different times," Edward said cautiously.

"Yeah, that uh… that makes sense."

I watched as Edward got into his Volvo and revved the engine. I took this as my cue to get into my dilapidated truck so he could follow me to school.

We got to campus at 7:15 and Edward still had 15 minutes before his class started so he walked me to my dorm room. His goodbye was distracted and seemingly less heart felt then a few days ago. He pulled away and looked into my eyes, "be careful."

I nodded and watched as he left. My breathed hitched as I closed the door. The only thing I could think to do was lean up against the door and slide down to the carpet. My arms found their way around my legs and held them tightly together. My body was beginning to recognize the feeling that rising inside me. My heart knew it all to well, even though I tired to not remember that time of my life. The time when the only person, the only family that I had ever loved that was not in my immediate family, had left me.

Yes, I knew that feeling and I remembered it well. I was having relapse of the night that Edward had left me and the hole in my heart that I thought had been nailed shut was beginning to open. I flexed my arms tighter, hoping to hold myself together as I leaned against the door. My breath became ragged as I tried to pull myself together. "We're fine…. We're fine…" I said over and over again. Although I knew we weren't.

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Edward's POV

I left Bella with ten minutes before class. I didn't stick around to make sure that she was okay, that she thought we were okay. I knew she was a very observant person and I couldn't keep things from here, even though I was keeping things from her. If I wasn't careful, I'd push her away without knowing it so I told myself on the way to class that when she got home, I'd make sure she knew I loved her and we were going to be fine.

I often forgot that the more I kept from her, for her safety of course, the worst the effect it had on her. She was strong and I knew that but I could never find it in me to burden her with things that I could fix; things that she shouldn't have to worry about. I'll fix it when she gets home so she knows that I'm doing this for her… for us. She'll understand and we can go back to being Edward and Bella. I hope.

I made it to class on time. My first class was Biology.

I'd taken this course, or at least similar versions, many times. I normally enjoyed Biology, it fascinated me. A favorite pastime of mine was conversing with Carlisle about the mechanics of everything. Today, however, I was only able to think of Alice's vision and how I'd take care of it. Her visions were subjective, they could change and I knew that. In fact, I tried to change her visions many times, today was no different. I switched my class time from 7:30 on Tuesday to 7:30 on Monday, hoping to avoid the conflict that she had foreseen.

I relaxed my head against the back of my seat. It was ten minutes into class and _she _was nowhere to be found. I apparently relaxed too soon because someone sat down gracefully beside me. _Curse those open seats. _

_Hello. _She thought. Damn. She found me and knew that I could read minds. This wasn't a good sign. My family and I preferred that no outside vampires knew of our powers so they didn't use them against us. Only if we trusted or new the vampire did we disclose our history.

I turned to look in the direction the voice, or the thought, was coming from and found it was only Lizzy. My tense muscles relaxed as I discovered it wasn't who I thought it was.

_Why are you so tense Edward?_

"Alice had a vision about someone and I thought that was who was sitting down, but it was only you," I replied.

_I see. _She said in her head. _So Alice can see the future?_

"Yeah… sort of." I didn't know how much I should tell Lizzy about our family's powers but I figured she already knew about Alice. Though it appears I was wrong.

_Interesting. _She thought.

"What's your skill or do you have one?"

_Don't have one, although I consider it a skill that I can control my thoughts around you pretty well. _She smiled.

I chucked in response, "yeah you are pretty good at that."

As the morning went on, I found Lizzy was in all of my classes and discovered she wasn't who I thought she was. I didn't feel like I had to worry about Bella anymore and that I could maybe trust Lizzy. This was good news to me.

At ten, I was done with my classes and I knew Bella would just be starting. I had three more hours to waste till she got home and I knew she'd be safe. The ride was quick of course since I drive like a 'mad man' as Bella puts it.

I pulled the Volvo into the garage and noticed Rosalie there.

"Car's looking great Rose," I complimented. She was trying to fix up a 1963 Studebaker Avanti R2 Supercharged **(picture on profile) **for Carlisle's birthday. It was black and she'd been working on it for two months solid.

"Thanks, I think I've almost got it to the point where it'll be ready for test ride. Wanna go with me when I do?"

"Loved to. Thanks."

"Yep," and with that Rose went back to work. The only time we ever got a long was when it came to our passion for cars. We tolerated each other as well as valued one another's opinion when it came to things like this. I did, however, love her regardless of how our relationship was. Though I'd never tell her that.

I walked into the living room and threw my book bag on the couch, flopping down beside it. My fingers went to my hair and being raking through them.

"Long day bro," Emmett asked?

"It wasn't bad but I need distractions till Bella gets home. So give me your worst."

I watched as an evil smile crept up his face.

"Jasp and I just made a new game. It's brutal!"

"Great! I'm in." I said enthusiastically.

Emmett looked at me skeptically. "You don't even know what it is."

"It's okay, let's go." I jumped up and went to find Jasper leaving Emmett to figure out my eagerness on his own.


	8. Kill It

**Disclaimer: I do no own the Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, or Breaking Dawn books. They and they characters mentioned in this book are the creation of Stephanie Meyer. I also do no own any of the songs lyrics that made be mentioned in this story. **

**Also, the links for the songs are on my profile page so you can get a feel for the mood I wanted to get across. **

**Lastly… please, please, please review. I like knowing what's going on in your heads so I know if I'm making things interesting. :) **

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Chapter eight: Kill It

I knew I should have figured out what the game was before I complied with Emmett. In his defense… he did warn me, sort of anyway. _Stupid brothers and their wack games._

Ten minutes after Emmett suggesting his and Jasper's new game, I found myself hanging upside down in a tree with a hockey mask on. "What's this game called again Jasper?"

I looked over at my brother who was also hanging from a tree about ten feet away. He was wearing a football helmet and looking quite content for it being Jasper. "Kill it," he said with a wide smile.

I figured that if Jasper liked this game, which from his expression, it looked like he did, I figured I might even like it.

"And how do we play it exactly?"

"Well," he stated, "We hang here until Emmett comes out of the house with the basketball. He'll be blindfolded and he has to shoot the ball in the hoop that's in the tree behind us. When he gets to that tree," he pointed at a tree 200 feet away from us, "we can jump out of the tree and fight him for the ball."

"I see," not really comprehending why this game would be fun for Jasper. "So what does 'kill it' refer to?"

Jasper turned his head to look at me. I was suddenly wary of his expression. There was an evil smirk that had risen on his face. I then smiled an evil smile myself as I read his thoughts.

_We get to beat the crap out of Emmett._

I was suddenly excited about this game. Excited about getting to repay Em for all those comments he's ever made about me and Bella. As well as all those times he stole my clothes while I was in the shower and hid them on the roof. Yes, this would be my new favorite game.

I watched as Emmett emerged from the house wearing an Equestrian hat and a blindfold. Jasper began running through strategies for me to follow so our attacks would be synchronized. _Poor Emmett. _

"Ready," Jasper asked?

"Ready," I said.

"Let's do it."

-------------------------------

**This song would be awesome for a game between vampires, beating each other up. So feel free to play this song at this point. I think it'll be awesome :)**

**Bleed It Out – Linkin Park**

--------------------------------

Jasper jumped out of the tree and sprinted towards Emmett causing leafs to gust in a circle behind him. I followed suit and jump out of the tree, landing in a crouch position. A wicked smile played across my face as Emmett sensed Jasper and took off in my direction. _This will be cake. _

I waited for Emmett to run close enough that I could attack and send him crashing to the ground. He was almost to me when he smiled and leapt into the air, landing on the branch directly overhead. I never gave Emmett the credit he deserved. He was pretty smart at times.

Jasper and I followed by ground, watching as Em jumped from branch to branch.

_Be ready to block the shot Edward. _Jasper yelled through his thought.

I was waiting under the hoop, ready to jump if Emmett's shot got anywhere close to the basket.

I watched as he came closer to the goal, he was still blindfolded and jumping from tree to tree. His was only vaguely aware of the direction the hoop was in. He shot the ball in the direction he thought the goal was in, only to be off my five feet. I took off in its direction and grabbed the ball. I turned around with a grin on my face.

"So what, is it my turn now?" I asked, with a smidge of cockiness.

I turned to watch as Jasper grinned at Emmett who was taking off his blindfold. He jumped down from the tree branch he was on and looked at Jasper.

"This doesn't mean anything Empath. I'm still going to win." Emmett laughed.

Jasper laughed and stated, "Stop being a sore loser Emmett. You can't win them all… actually you can't win any of them can you."

I laughed at that and saw how much it was provoking Emmett. Leave it to Jasper to get the train going.

All of a sudden Emmett started running towards me. Jasper followed in pursuit. My eyes went wide as I saw them both charging towards me. I had a quick moment of indecision as I decided on whether to shoot the ball myself or pass it to Jasper who was running in my direction.

"Run to the goal Edward!" Jasper yelled.

"No Eddie Boy, give me the ball," Emmett laughed.

"Yeah right," I scoffed and sprinted off towards the goal.

I was running as fast as I could, weaving in and out of the trees. I loved being a vampire at times like these. When I could feel the wind in my hair and just let lose.

When I got under the goal, I turned and jumped in the air. I looked for the basket, trying to aim the ball and will it into the goal.

I was suddenly hit by a wall as Emmett lurched towards me knocking me to the ground. The ball went soaring through the air. Emmett took off in the balls direction and Jasper ran to me and helped me up.

I laughed for a short second.

"He's mine," I told Jasper.

"Alright," Jasper laughed, stepping back out of my way.

I took off in the direction that the ball went soaring in, in order to regain my pride. I quickly caught up with Emmett and jumped on his back, sending us both into a strong oak tree. It did minimal danger to the innocent bystander, but Emmett took the blunt of the force. His shirt ripped up in the front as we skidded over some roots.

"Dang it Edward! Why you always got to do that? Rose is not going to be happy, she bought me this." He said as he finger the rip in his shirt.

I shook my head at him and dived at the ball that was now only feet away.

"I don't think so Eddie," Emmett quirked.

He grabbed a hold of my foot and stopped me in mid air; the ball was barely out of reach. Emmett started to reach for it when Jasper ran by, picking it up.

He ran to the goal and jumped, doing some sort of somersault and throwing the ball into the goal. He landed with a smug grin.

"That's one point for me," he said.

"Yeah, yeah… but that's the only point you're going to get," Emmett swore as he got off of me and let me up. "It's your turn Edward."

The game went on for two more hours. The point and rules of the game were soon lost as we found it was more fun to beat the crap out of each other with no rules to hold us back. I got scraped up the most, considering I was playing with the epitome of a bear and a strategic military sergeant. Some things weren't fair but neither was I being able to read their minds.

The beauty was that none of us cared that the other was playing dirty. It's what made the game and despite my mind reading skills, Emmett and Jasper tied, with 25 points. I only got 12 points but this was a game that I'd definitely play again so I could have a chance to redeem myself.


	9. Should've

**Disclaimer: I do no own the Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, or Breaking Dawn books. They and they characters mentioned in this book are the creation of Stephanie Meyer. I also do no own any of the songs lyrics that made be mentioned in this story. **

**Also, the links for the songs are on my profile page so you can get a feel for the mood I wanted to get across. **

**Lastly… please, please, please review. I like knowing what's going on in your heads so I know if I'm making things interesting. :) **

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Chapter Nine: Should've

Bella's POV

I walked into the living room and sat down on the couch. I noticed that the house was deserted and it felt eerie. _Where is everyone? _I thought. I searched the first floor before I found a note from Alice on the kitchen counter.

_Went to hunt with the family, be back soon. Alice_

Well that answers my question. I trudged up to my room on the third floor, exhausted from the day. It was a relatively good day considering I had three extremely long classes. I even met a friend that was in two of my classes. Her name was Sonny and she was quite. We barely talked but that was more than enough for both of us. Just to know that we had someone to suffer through classes with made us friends and thankful for the company.

I stopped briefly in front of my door and thought about where Edward was. My thoughts didn't linger long on the question because I just assumed that he was with the rest of the family hunting. He went to long without hunting sometimes so I was glad that he left to tend to his needs. I would tend to mine while he was gone.

I was planning on getting a shower when I walked into the bathroom. Edward had placed a CD player in my bathroom for me because he knew I liked to relax listening to classical music. It was a weakness of mine and I smiled when I noticed how thoughtful he was to put one in there for me. My CDs, however, were still packed away in a box of stuff that I had decided I wanted to keep at the Cullen's house.

Thankfully, Edward never minded when I borrowed his CDs so I put my stuff on the counter and decided to go find some music.

His door was cracked and I could see shadows moving around. If I listened hard enough, I realized I could hear voices. I'm sure it was Emmett ransacking Edward's clothes. He frequently hid Edward's clothes on the roof but would he be talking to himself? I wouldn't put it past him. Curiosity got the better of me and I opened the door.

It was suddenly really hard to breath. My lungs felt constricted and my body was numb. I struggled to take a sharp breathe as I fell to my knees. Who knew your world could come crashing down within a matter of seconds.

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Edward's POV

I went to my room after the rousing game of Kill It that Jasper and Emmett and I played. It was amazing; I'd have to play that with them again. I knew I was caked in dirt and mud so I thought now would be a good time to get a shower. Bella wouldn't be home for another half an hour and that was plenty of time to get clean.

Thinking of Bella reminded me to put the CD player I got her in her bathroom. She loved listening to music, classical especially, while she relaxed in the bathtub. I set in on the rim of the bathtub and took off to take my shower.

The warm shower felt great against my cool skin. I washed all the dirt off and washed my hair. When I decided I was clean enough, I stepped out of the shower and put on my clothes. It was Bella's favorite shirt that I had put on. I was ready to fix these past couple of days and apologize for the way I had been acting. So yes, I was sucking up.

I heard movement in my room and I got excited. I heard her heart beat and the couch cushions as she set down and waited for me. I hurried even faster and stepped out of the bathroom. She was breathtaking as usual. She had a look in her eye that I couldn't place, it was almost a smug look but that wasn't a look I had seen before from her so I was unsure of what it was.

"Hey love, how was your day?" I asked her as I set down on the couch.

"Just fine," she replied. She leaned into me and began to kiss me. The kiss was different, it was hard and urgent. If I wasn't looking at Bella, I would've thought it wasn't her. I couldn't take this difference and pulled away.

"Are you okay?" I asked her.

"I'm fine… Edward. I'm especially better now that I'm with you." She stood up and grabbed my hand; pulling me up with her. She placed her arms around my neck and leaned into me and kissed me along my jaw line.

"Close your eyes," she whispered into my ear. I did as she said and closed my eyes; enjoying the feel of her warm lips.

I couldn't take it anymore and crushed her lips to mine. My hands found the small of her back and pulled her too me. Her kiss was fierce and animalistic and I was lost in it. I couldn't find anything in me to pull away like I usually did when we got carried away. I needed her as close to me as possible. I needed to feel her.

Somewhere in our kiss I felt a change in her body. Like her body was shifting or something but I was so far gone I couldn't care. I didn't open my eyes, I just kept kissing her. Trying to get as close to her as I could. I crushed her body to mine and heard her whisper my name in my mouth.

My eyes opened as I heard her whisper my name. It wasn't Bella's voice. Instead, I found that it was Lizzy that I was holding in my arms. I started to step back because I was confused. I didn't understand what had just happened, nor did I understand the feelings that were rising up in me. I was angry but there was something else… something that kept me from yelling at her in fury.

Lizzy took a step forward.

"Don't be mad Edward. I had to make you realize your feelings for me. I had to make you see."

I stared at her as she talked, inching closer to me with every step.

"You want to be with me too don't you Edward? You can feel it." She placed her hand over my dead heart.

I shook my head, I was confused. I loved Bella…. Not Lizzy. This was exactly what I was trying to prevent. Alice and I had been working so hard to stay away from this situation… from whomever it was that was going to strain Bella and I's relationship. How did she trick me? How did we not see that it was Lizzy we should've been staying away from? More importantly; why was I not running from her now?

She raised her hand and placed it on my cheek, and I stared into her yellow eyes. I should've of done something. I should've let go of her hand or said no when I saw her leaning in towards me. I should've pushed her into the wall when I felt her lips on mine. I should've done something else when I felt her arms wrap around my neck. All of those should haves, but instead I found myself kissing her back.

I was lost in the kiss when I heard the door open. Once again I should've stopped because no matter who came through that door, they shouldn't see me kissing someone else. My mind immediately went to Emmett since he's always barging in my room. I was getting ready to step away from Lizzy but I took too long.

I heard the sharp breath. I heard something crashing to the floor. I knew I didn't have to see her to know who it was. I heard the heart stop; the sporadic breathing. I smelled the wonderful scent that I adored. Yes, I knew who it was that saw me kissing Lizzy. I knew it was Bella and I finally had to force myself to turn and face her.

Tears were beginning to fall and her hands were balled into fists.

I should've ran to her… but I stood still… with my arms still wrapped around Lizzy. Yes… I was an idiot.

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_Taylor Swift – Should've Said No_

_Chorus:  
__You should've said no, you should've gone home __•__ You should've thought twice before you let it all go __•__ You should've know that word, bout what you did with her __• __Would get back to me... __• __And I should've been there, in the back of your mind __• __I shouldn't be asking myself why __• __You shouldn't be begging for forgiveness at my feet... __• __You should've said no, baby and you might still have me_

_I can't resist... before you go, tell me this __•__ Was it worth it... __• __Was she worth this..._


	10. Maneater

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, or Breaking Dawn books. They and they characters mentioned in this book are the creation of Stephanie Meyer. I also do not own any of the song lyrics that made be mentioned in this story. **

**Also, the links for the songs are on my profile page so you can get a feel for the mood I wanted to get across. **

**Lastly… please, please, please review. I like knowing what's going on in your heads so I know if I'm making things interesting. :) **

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Chapter Ten: Maneater

Lizzy's POV

Mission accomplished.

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_Maneater – Nelly Furtado_

_[Timbaland:] _

_Take it back, take it back... _

_[Nelly Furtado:]_

_Everybody look at me, me • I walk in the door you start screaming • Come on everybody what you're here for • Move your body around like a nympho • Everybody get your neck to crack around • All you crazy people come on jump around • I wanna see you all on your knees, knees • You either wanna be with me or be me_

_Chorus:_

_Maneater • Make you work hard, make you spend all • Make you want all of her love • She's a maneater • Make you buy cars, make you cut cards • Make you fall real hard in love • She's a maneater • Make you work hard, make you spend all • Make you want all of her love • She's a maneater • Make you buy cars, make you cut cards • Wish you never ever met her at all_

_And when she walks she walks with passion • When she talks, she talks like she can handle it • When she asks for something boy, she means it • Even if you never, ever see it • Everybody get your neck to crack around • All you crazy people come on jump around • You doing anything to keep her by your side • Because she says she love you, love you long time _

_Chorus to end_


	11. Uncontrollable

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, or Breaking Dawn books. They and they characters mentioned in this book are the creation of Stephanie Meyer. I also do not own any of the song lyrics that made be mentioned in this story. **

**Also, the links for the songs are on my profile page so you can get a feel for the mood I wanted to get across. **

**Lastly… please, please, please review. I like knowing what's going on in your heads so I know if I'm making things interesting. :) **

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Chapter Eleven: Uncontrollable

Bella's POV

Anger filled me. It filled every limb of my body. Adrenaline coursed through my veins and malice pooled into my mouth as I watched him embrace that Siren. Ignominy crossed his face as I watched him slowly turn to look at that… at that… whore.

I picked myself up and ran out of his room. I ran down the stairs as fast as I could and out the door. I didn't know where I was going considering he could catch up to me no matter how fast I ran or how far. That was if he was following me but something told me not to worry about that.

I ran as fast as I could to create as much distance between him and me as I could. Tears filled my eyes as I ran, occasionally shooting glances over my shoulder to see if Edward was behind me. I clearly wasn't watching where I was going so I ran into something that felt like a stone wall.

I fell flat on my back as I looked up and saw Jasper standing over me. Pain was etched into ever feature of his perfect face. I could only assume that I was the one causing him to ache. Every wave of emotion that rolled off of me was filled with it.

He reached out for my hand. I looked up at it; questioning it. Eventually, I grabbed his hand and let him pull me up. I didn't want to make him uncomfortable so I stood there, with my head turned and hands shoved into my pocket. I figured it was a pointless gesture since I was making myself uncomfortable and because I was standing in front of an Empath, I was making him uncomfortable as well. I then looked at him and I was suddenly angry with him. I didn't know why. He didn't do anything to me, I'm sure he would've told me if he would've known.

After a long moment, I felt his arms around me, pulling me to his chest. I lost it. I threw my arms around his waist and I cried. I cried for being stupid, I cried for Edward's idiocy, I cried because of that brainless, beautiful vampire that was kissing my Edward. I cried for so many reasons and I didn't know how to stop. I sobbed uncontrollably for a long time and Jasper just let me. He didn't try and alter my feelings, he didn't push me away, he just let me cry and get it all out. Jasper Hale, the same vampire that almost killed me, just stood there and let me cry with my arms wrapped tightly around his waist. If I wasn't so consumed with my emotions, I would've been happy for him and his progress but like I said, I was lost.

Eventually I calmed down on my own accord. I looked up at Jasper and smiled.

"Thanks," I said quietly.

He smiled a little in return.

"Alice finally shared her vision today. We were hunting and she stopped suddenly. She quickly told me what was happening and that I needed to rush back here and help."

I looked up at him; curiosity was spread across my face. I didn't have to ask him why she said he had to find me because he answered the question for me.

"She knew you'd be mad at her for not warning you so she wanted me to come and try to help with your feelings. I know you're mad at her, I can feel it. I'm mad at her too but she said her and Edward were trying to prevent this from happening. For what it's worth, she's sorry and you know she wouldn't do anything to intentionally hurt you."

"I know," was all I could get out and it was the truth. I knew that was the truth but regardless, she did hurt me. She helped that slut rip out my insides without even knowing it.

I flopped down on the ground and placed my head between my legs, trying to breathe in and out regularly. I was exhausted from the emotional rollercoaster that Edward had sent me on. I looked up and noticed Jasper staring at the ground, clearly indecisive. Finally, Jasper shrugged and set down beside me. He looked extremely uncomfortable at having to sit on the ground and get his clothes dirty.

I laughed a little, even though it hurt. "You don't have to sit on the ground Jasper, I understand."

He smiled, "It's alright. I can handle a little dirt. Alice will probably throw these away anyhow since she doesn't let me wear the same thing twice."

"Yeah…" I sighed. We sat in silence for a few minutes.

"What am I going to do Jasper?" I leaned my head against his shoulder and breathed deeply, he smelled of citrus.

"You need to talk to him. You don't know what's going on through his head; it might not be what you think."

"Well, what do you think it is?"

He hesitated for a second, looking for the right words to say.

"I think that Edward would also not do anything to intentionally hurt you." Jasper was such a gentleman, still trying to defend his brother even if Edward was in the wrong.

"I can't talk to him right now Jasp. It hurts to bad."

"I know, let me take you to your dorm. I'll talk to Edward and tell him to give you space, okay?"

"Thanks Jasp."

"You're welcome."

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I cried myself to sleep that night. Sobs became an unavoidable part of it. As soon as I walked through the door, the sobs hit me. I stumbled to my desk and leaned over it with my palms gripping the sides. I was struggling to breathe again. I tried to hold it all in until Jasper dropped me off. It was hard, but I managed to keep myself together, even though Jasper said that he didn't mind me expressing my feelings. I assured him that I was okay and he let it go.

I realized that I had been hunched over the desk, sobbing, for awhile and it was becoming uncomfortable. I didn't want to cry anymore, I didn't want to think it was over between me and Edward. I wanted to believe it was all a misunderstanding even if the signs clearly pointed to our downfall.

My head went up slightly, raising my gaze. My eyes landed on the picture frame that Renee bought me for graduation. It held the picture of me and Edward on my 18th birthday; the picture that I treasured the most.

My nose began to flare as anger and the feeling of betrayal overtook me. I picked up the picture of Edward and me. My fingers went directly to Edward and grazed over his face before the rage was more than I could take. I threw the frame at the door. It shattered into a million pieces, sailing into all corners of the room.

It felt good to release my feelings; so good that I looked for something else to throw. I noticed some CDs that I had left on my desk. They were the perfect object to throw; especially since they were from Edward. I flung each one of them against the door, relishing in the site of them flying across the room in pieces.

I scavenged my room looking for things that Edward had given me and I broke them. I broke them all; just like he had broken my heart… again. It was like he picked up my heart and flung it against the door to watch it shatter into a million pieces.

The glass resembled my heart in so many ways and it made me ache even more when I came to that comprehension.

I found more things to destroy and I did. I destroyed them with so much force that my arm began to hurt. I looked around my disastrous room and fell to the floor, clinging to the one thing I couldn't bring myself to annihilate.

I looked at the bracelet resting in my hand and fingered the charm that Edward gave me. It was a diamond heart that was his mothers. It was stunning and resembled him in every way. It was a cold, hard, stone that sparkled in the light.

As much as it hurt to think about, I always knew that I didn't deserve Edward. Just like when he left me the first time, I believed that it was because I always knew that it was too good to be true. That there was always the possibility that he would find someone else to be with that was more beautiful. That was more like him… a beautiful, goddess, Siren vampire that would claim his heart in a way I could never do. I always knew it was a possibility, I just never thought it would all happen like this.

I muted a sob as I found the other charm on my bracelet. It was a small, wooden wolf that Jacob had carved for me.

"Jacob," I whispered.

It was only Monday and I needed him. I needed him now more than ever. I wanted to get into my truck and drive to him and hide from everything. I knew that I couldn't so I settled for just hearing his voice.

I crawled across the floor and found my purse. The phone was still set on vibrate from when I had class earlier that day, when things were better. I noticed had a missed call from Jasper. I assumed that he figured out that I wouldn't want to talk on the phone to anyone so he also sent a text message to me.

_Alice wants you to call her when you're up to it. She really is sorry._

I sighed deeply and texted him back.

_I know. I'll call her tomorrow._

After I texted Jasper and Alice I dialed Jacob's number and waited for him to answer.

"I notice Edward hasn't tried to call me," I mumbled.

Jacob picked up the phone.

"Hello," Jake answered.

"Hi Jake, it's me." My voice cracked on the last word.

"Bella? What's wrong?"

"Jake… I really need to talk to you. You won't believe what happened."

"I'm here Bells, you can talk to me."

Jake and I talked for an hour about everything that had happened. He was furious of course and it took everything in me to convince him not to get in his Rabbit and drive up tonight; even though I really wanted him to.

"Jake, I just really need to be alone tonight okay? I promise I'll call you tomorrow."

"Okay Bells, get some rest and please call me soon," Jacob responded.

"Yeah, okay. Later Jake."

"Bye Bells."

Like I said… that night I cried myself to sleep.

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Cry – Kelly Clarkson

If anyone asks, _• I'll tell them we both just moved on • When people all stare • I'll pretend that I don't hear them talk • Whenever I see you, • I'll swallow my pride and bite my tongue • Pretend that I'm okay with it all • Act like there's nothing wrong_

_Chorus:  
_Is it over yet? _• Can I open my eyes? • Is this as hard as it gets? • Is this what it feels like to really cry? • Cry?_

_If anyone asks, • I'll tell them we just grew apart • Yeah what do I care • If they believe me or not • Whenever I feel • you're memory is breaking my heart • I'll pretend I'm okay with it all • Act like there's nothing wrong_

_Chorus_

_I'm talking in circles • I'm lying, they know it • Why won't this just all go away?_

_Chorus_


	12. Surprise Guest

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, or Breaking Dawn books. They and they characters mentioned in this book are the creation of Stephanie Meyer. I also do not own any of the song lyrics that made be mentioned in this story. **

**Also, the links for the songs are on my profile page so you can get a feel for the mood I wanted to get across. **

**Lastly… please, please, please review. I like knowing what's going on in your heads so I know if I'm making things interesting. :) **

--------------------------------------------------------

Chapter Twelve: Surprise Guest

?? POV

I was irate. I was racing down the highway at the average speed of 100, trying to get to Bella as fast as I could. That idiot! How could he do this to her? After everything she's been through, he decided she needed a second round of ignorance on his part. I couldn't believe what had happened. Nothing could have prepared me for that moment I heard the news. A growl roared in my chest as I felt my anger boiling up at the thought of him.

My hands gripped the steering will as I saw the University of Alaska sign. With as fast as I was driving, I reached the University in no time and slammed on the brakes, sailing into a parking spot. I was driving reckless, that was for sure, but I think I had a good reason to. Nobody hurts my Bells and gets away with it.

A crowd of people was standing in front of her building when I got out of the car. They divided down the center, creating a path for me, once they saw my expression. I couldn't blame them; I wouldn't want to get in my way either.

There was a lady at the front desk that I noticed when I busted through the door. She didn't bother to greet me, probably too afraid to say anything.

"Bella Swan's room? She's expecting me and said to ask for her room number and come right up." I lied, she wasn't expecting me but I wasn't going to stay home either.

"It's uh... well I'm not supposed to give that information out." She said, but it was clear her resolve wouldn't hold for long. I'm ashamed to say that I used this in my favor.

"Listen lady, I really need to see her okay? It's important," I growled, bearing my teeth.

"J-J-Just a second," she stammered and then turned to look through the books.

"She's in room 213. It's down that corridor and up the stairs."

"Thanks," I replied.

I ran up the stairs, taking two at a time, until I reached the landing. There was a couple of girls walking down the hallway and decided it would be best if I didn't continue to charge down the hallway, they might call the cops. I grimaced at walking at a human pace and finally reached Bella's door. I drew in a deep breath, trying to calm my shaking and knocked on her door.

I could hear the faint rustling of blankets and the footsteps that followed; alerting me that she was headed to the door.

"Who is it?" she asked. I couldn't help but hear the raspy tone that her voice held. She had definitely been crying... a lot. I had to draw in another breath to calm myself as I thought of Edward.

"Guess who," I said, forcing a small grin.

The door quickly unlocked and she jumped into my arms.

"Jake!" she exclaimed. "What are you doing here? I told you that you didn't have to come. I'm fine."

"Yeah well, you aren't a good liar. I know you needed me. Besides, you look awful Bells."

"Pff... I do not," she retorted.

I raised my eyebrow up, questioning her lie.

"Maybe your right," she said defeated.

She turned to walk back into her room. I looked inside and felt my jaw drop. Her room was disastrous. No that wasn't the right word. It was cataclysmic. There was broken glass strewn about the room, her picture frames were off the wall, her clothes were everywhere _except_ in her closet and there were two empty pints of moose track ice cream sitting on her nightstand by a box of Kleenexes.

"What happened to your room?" I asked; horrified at the amount of damage a small girl like Bella could do.

"I was upset," she said innocently and went back to set on her bed.

The TV was on and she was watching The Break-up; the one with Jennifer Aniston and Vince Vaughn.

"Seriously Bella?" I asked while pointing at the screen.

"Seemed appropriate," she muttered.

"Oh... have you talked to him? Did he break-up with you or something?"

"No we haven't talked. I don't know what to say to him."

I nodded my head as I walked over and sat on her bed.

"I have some things I'd like to say to him," I growled.

"I'm sure you do but you need to stay out of this okay? I don't need you guys fighting on top of everything else."

I studied her face while she talked. Her eyes were blood shot and puffy, her hair was in knots, her cheeks were splotchy and it looked like she barely had any sleep. _That stupid bloodsucker. Just when I was starting to tolerate him._

"Fine," I said. But she couldn't hold me back for long. I'll get my chance to tell him what I think of him.

"I think I'm going to talk to him tomorrow though."

"Oh... can I come with you?" Fat chance of that happening, I knew she'd say no.

"It's something I need to do on my own but thanks."

"You're welcome. So... I think I've done pretty well about being calm about this whole thing so if you don't mind, can we do something so I don't go all werewolf on you. You know, divert my anger kind of thing."

She laughed, "Yeah. There's a burger joint around the corner and they've got arcade games or something like that. We can do that if you want."

"Yeah, let's go." I said, pulling her up by the hand.

"Okay, give me a sec to get changed and stuff."

"Alright, I'll be outside."

"Okay."

I stepped out into the hallway and closed the door. _Stupid leech, _I thought, _he'll pay for this. _

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

BPOV

"Just call him or I'm going to call him for you," Jacob said.

I had been trying to dial Edward's number for the past twenty minutes to tell him I'm ready to talk to him. I couldn't bring myself to hit send. I suppose it was mainly because I didn't want to hear the truth. If he really loved Lizzy or wanted to try and make things work with her, it would all be too much for my human heart to handle. I had to know though; if there was nothing left between us then it's better to know now instead of dragging it out any longer. I sighed deeply as I pushed send.

Ring… Ring… "Hello? Bella?" anxiously said that soft, velvety voice.

"Hi Edward," I whispered. My control wasn't what I thought it was as I fought to hold back the tears.

"Bella, I'm so sorry. I…"

I cut him off, "I know. Look we need to talk about this so I'm going to come over okay?"

"Okay, good. I'm just going to go hunt real quick but I'll be back as soon as I can okay?"

"Okay, bye Edward."

"Bye Bella, I…" he started to say, but I couldn't hear it because I pushed the end button. I held out as long as I could, but the tears starting to roll. The phone fell out of my hand as I sat on my bed.

"What'd he say?" Jacob asked.

"I didn't let him say anything. I just told him I'd be over in a few minutes and he's going to go hunt first. So now I just need to figure out what to say to him."

"Just say what you need to, don't hold back on it okay?"

"Okay, well I'll see you when I get back."

"Good luck, Bells."

"Thanks Jake, Bye."

"Bye."

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

EPOV

"EDWARD! Unlock this door. We need to talk. Don't make me break down this door," yelled Alice.

"Dang it Alice, I told you I need time to think about this stuff."

Why did no one get that I needed to figure things out. I messed things up so badly that I didn't know what to do. How could I not know that it wasn't Bella? What the heck was wrong with me? Why did I keep kissing Lizzy when I knew it wasn't Bella? And more importantly, how the crap did she make me think she was Bella? I thought she didn't have any powers. I needed to talk to Lizzy about how she did that stuff.

There were so many questions that wouldn't stop bombarding me.

"Edward!"

"Leave it alone Alice!"

How did Lizzy turn into Bella? How did she turn into a human? Why the heck did I keep kissing her?

Fuck!

My life was screwed up. It was turning into more of a freak show than normal.

"Fine, but I'll be back."

Ugh! Whatever, I'll be gone by the time she comes back anyway.

"I do know where to find you if you leave."

Crap.

"Fine, we'll talk later."

I flopped down on the couch and placed my arm over my eyes. I didn't know what to do anymore. I promised Jasper I'd let Bella come to me but this was getting ridiculous. I didn't know how much longer I could wait on Bella. I had to talk to her. I had to figure out this thing with Lizzy. I couldn't talk to Lizzy either 'because she left to spend some time on her own for a couple of days.

The confusing thing was that I enjoyed kissing Lizzy, but I didn't love her like Bella. Yet I couldn't stop thinking about Lizzy's kiss.

Fuck my life!

The silence of my room was broken by my cell phone. It was vibrating on my desk. I got up off my couch to go get the phone. My mood was lifted exponentially when I noticed it said I was receiving a call from Bella.

"Hello? Bella?" I said anxiously into the phone.

"Hi Edward," she whispered. Her voice was so broken and it killed me to hear her this way.

"Bella, I'm so sorry. I…" She cut me off before I could say anything else.

"I know. Look we need to talk about this so I'm going to come over okay?"

"Okay, good. I'm just going to go hunt real quick but I'll be back as soon as I can okay?"

I hadn't hunted for about two weeks now and I couldn't put Bella at risk.

"Okay, bye Edward."

"Bye Bella, I love you." However, I don't think she heard me tell her that I loved her because the phone went silent after I told her bye. She was obviously still upset. Our talk was going to be hard, but it needed to be done. I on the other hand, needed to figure out what the heck I was going to do. I needed to make a choice.

Should I fight for Bella and me or is Lizzy worth giving a try. Shit… I didn't know.


	13. Lie To Me

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, or Breaking Dawn books. They and they characters mentioned in this book are the creation of Stephanie Meyer. I also do not own any of the song lyrics that made be mentioned in this story. **

**Also, the links for the songs are on my profile page so you can get a feel for the mood I wanted to get across. **

**Lastly… please, please, please review. I like knowing what's going on in your heads so I know if I'm making things interesting. :) **

--------------------------------------------------------

Chapter Thirteen: Lie To Me 

Bella's POV

I sat in my car outside of the Cullen Mansion, pounding my head on the steering wheel. I couldn't help but notice the four Cullen's out of the corner of my eye that were watching me beat myself up. Emmett held a piece of paper in his hand that he passed between him and Jasper. When I finally hit my head for the last time, I looked up at the window and saw Emmett taking a wad of cash from Jasper and throwing his fists in the air. I then noticed Rosalie giving the boys a horrible scowl that I couldn't help but think was for me. I'd have to thank her for that one day.

However, it was official. My life was pathetic. You could figure that out when you saw your friends making bets about you.

I reached into my glove department and found some Tylenol and took it before I got out of the car. The door was already open for me.

"Edward isn't back yet but you can go wait for him in his room," said Alice.

"Thanks Alice and I forgive you. But you already know that."

"Yes, but it feels so much better to hear you say that." She took me in her arms and gave me a hug before sending me on my way up the staircase. Before I got to the fifth step I turned around and faced the Cullen siblings. I couldn't help but hear Alice giggle as I did so. She obviously knew what I was going to say.

"Hey Emmett… Jasper…"

"Yes," they both answered.

"What was the bet?"

"How did you…" Emmett started but Jasper finished his sentence.

"…know we had a bet?"Jasper asked. He too was dumbfounded as to how I knew they had a bet going.

"I know your victory dance Emmett." I briefly mimicked his dancing before I turned to face them both with my hands on my hips.

Alice, Jasper and even Rose laughed at Emmett's expense.

"Like you all can dance. You are all just jealous that I have skills," said Emmett.

"Right…," Jasper said. "Anyway we had a bet to see how many times you'd hit your head on the steering wheel. Emmett said 50 and I said 49."

I laughed a little and nodded. "I'm going up to his room to wait for him, try not to have too much fun."

I then turned and continued my trek up the three flights of stairs. I could've waited for him in my room but I thought that if this was the last time I'd be in his room, then I wanted to savor some things. Like the smell of his room, his CD collection, his books, pictures, clothes, and so many other things. I wanted to hold on to every detail just in case this conversation took a turn for the worse like I feared it would.

His room smelled just as good as usual. He had clearly been spending a lot of time in here because the smell was strong. He had a few CDs on his desk that he must have been listening to recently. I ran my fingers over the covers, remembering his favorite music types. I then went to his end table and picked up the book he was reading. He had said many times in the past that he had hated this book, but for some reason he was reading it now. Romeo and Juliet had always been one of my favorites though.

After I set the book back down on the end table, I sat on the couch and held my head in my hands. _I can do this. I can do this. _I repeated to myself. I had to hype myself up or I'd find myself running down to my truck and high-tailing it back to my dorm room.

"Hi Bella," said a voice that I could never forget. I'd always recognize that voice.

"Edward," I sighed. I stood up and took a step closer to him. He was leaning against the door with a pained expression.

He opened his mouth to speak and it hit me. Like a ton of bricks. I realized I wasn't ready for this. Not tonight. The sun was setting and if tonight was all that was left of us; I wanted to pretend everything was okay.

"Wait!" I said. I know I surprised him, the look on his face said it all.

"But Bella, you need to know some things."

"I know, but not right now."

"Then what _do_ you want?"

"I want you to lie to me."

"Lie to you?"

"Yes, just for tonight. I need you to lie to me." I whispered.

He took a step towards me, "but Bella."

"No. Hold on to your secrets tonight because I don't want to know. I don't want to know what happened or what she means to you. I'm okay with the silence because the truth is going to change everything. I know that there's no turning back. If we put too much light on this then we'll see through all the cracks so let's just stay in the dark one more night."

"I don't think I understand what you're asking of me. "

I laughed a humorless laugh.

"I need you to lie to me and tell me that's it going to be alright. Lie to me and tell me that we'll make it through the night. I don't mind if you wait before you tear me apart. Just look me in the eyes and lie."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Edward's POV

I watched as tears rolled down her eyes. I watched as she walked past me and stopped at the door. She turned and held her hand out for me to take. I took it.

I let her lead me across the hall to her room. I let her lead me to the bed where she laid down and motioned for me to lay with her. I walked to the bed and lay down beside her.

I didn't move. I was too stunned by her actions and her words to do anything else. I looked down at her as she turned into my chest. She looked up at me and her lips crashed into mine.

It was a frantic and burning kiss. It was like she felt that we wouldn't have tomorrow. She thought I'd choose Lizzy over her. At least it was the way it seemed. I kissed her back and pulled her close to me.

All too soon, she pulled away and rested her forehead against mine. I wanted to say something, to say anything but as soon as I opened my mouth to speak, she pressed her finger against it.

"Please Edward, let's just lay here."

"Okay," I replied and held her. I sang her lullaby while she cried herself to sleep. The painful part was that she wouldn't let me do anything to stop her tears. I had placed her into her own personal hell and she wouldn't let me do anything to fix it.

I felt my stone, cold, dead heart break into a million pieces that night. I wished for tears to drown myself in. I wished for a way to go back and fix everything. I wished for anything that would take her pain away and place it all on me.


	14. Broken Vow

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, or Breaking Dawn books. They and they characters mentioned in this book are the creation of Stephanie Meyer. I also do not own any of the song lyrics that made be mentioned in this story. **

**Also, the links for the songs are on my profile page so you can get a feel for the mood I wanted to get across. **

**Lastly… please, please, please review. I like knowing what's going on in your heads so I know if I'm making things interesting. :) **

--------------------------------------------------------

Chapter Fourteen: Broken Vow

Bella's POV

I woke up with a start. I realized that I was lying in my bed alone and it was still dark out. My hands felt desperately on the side of the bed where I remembered Edward laying when we fell asleep. His side of the bed was still cold from where he had been laying, but in its place laid a folded piece of paper. I rubbed my eyes and reached over to turn the bedside lamp on. I unfolded the note and read Edward's neat script:

I had to go hunting but I'll be back soon. I plan to be back before you wake, but just in case, I left you this note. Sleep well love.

Edward

I looked at the clock and saw it said five o'clock. I had plenty of time before my classes started but if I waited till Edward got back, it might be hard to leave him. So I decided to leave now and come back later to talk; after my classes were over and such.

I got out of bed and headed down the stairs, trying to be as quiet as I could. Alice was waiting for me on the couch however. _Figures _I thought.

"Are you sure you want to do this Bella?" she asked me.

"I'll be back, Alice, I just need time to think."

"I know you do but he'll be back in ten minutes. You can work this all out now and be Bella and Edward within an hour."

"I don't think it's that simple Alice. Not this time." I sniffed.

I opened the door and left without a word and ran to my truck.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

School was a restless occasion because I was nervous about my talk with Edward after I got out of school. It would be hard, it would suck, and it may even kill me. Okay… so I'm exaggerating, but that still doesn't mean that I felt like I was going to explode at any moment.

I drove up Edward's driveway slowly and then got out. I felt like I was marching to my death and I could almost hear the drudge that would be played if I were. My shaky hand pressed the doorbell button and I it was Edward that answered the door. Once in, he ushered me to the couch. I noticed that the house was deserted except for him.

"So… I guess I'm ready to talk about this," I said in a whisper.

"Alright," he mumbled.

"So, I need you to tell me what happened."

Edward turned to face me and began the story. He told me how he was getting a shower after his game with Jasper and Emmett. He explained how Lizzy had a power to shift into humans or something and that he thought it was me. Lastly he admitted that after he knew it was Lizzy, that he kissed her again.

He explained everything to me and I can't remember the last time I felt so broken. I don't know if I had ever felt so dead.

After he explained everything, I asked him about Alice's vision. I needed to know why he didn't tell me.

"What about Alice's vision? Why didn't you just tell me?"

"I didn't know how to tell you. I didn't want you to worry about something that I didn't think you'd have to. Alice and I were trying to so hard to prevent it but she had holes in her visions. We didn't know it'd be Lizzy that would cause this."

"You still should've told me Edward! I'm not sure what to even think about this whole thing. How could I ever trust you again to tell me the truth?"

"I know Bella, I messed up. We handled it wrong and I'm so sorry for that."

"Do you have feelings for her?" The question surprised me as it spewed from my mouth. I knew it was the right question to ask but I didn't want to know the truth.

Edward's eyes met mine, just as surprised as me to hear the question. "What?"

"Do you have feelings for Lizzy?" I restated.

"I… I don't know. I'm confused about everything."

I knew I had to do it at that point. I knew he wouldn't understand. It's so hard to see myself without him. I felt a piece of my heart break as I spoke.

"Wrong answer Edward."

When you're standing at a crossroad, there's a choice that you've got to make and sometimes it's going to hurt. It's going to hurt so bad that you'll barely be able to breathe but sometimes… you have to let go to get to the other side.

"I can't do this anymore Edward. I don't feel like I can trust you anymore and the fact that your confused about Lizzy just hurts worse. I don't want to hurt anymore. Every time I look at you I see her and you and it just hurts. I'm sorry Edward but…" I choked on my words.

He reached out his hands to stop me from rising off the couch.

"No, Edward."

"Bella please, don't do this."

"I hope she makes you happy Edward. I really do."

I ran out of the house; tears welling in my eyes. I slammed the door of my truck and looked up to see Edward standing on the porch.

"Stay here Edward, please," I whispered, knowing he could hear me.

His head dropped as he fell to his knees. Seeing him broken like that made it even harder to drive away. I watched in the rearview mirror as I left my future on the porch, crying tearless sobs.

_Starts With Goodbye - Carrie Underwood_

_I was sitting on my doorstep, • I hung up the phone and it fell out of my hand, _

_But I knew I had to do it, • And he wouldn't understand, • So hard to see myself without him, • I felt a piece of my heart break, • But when you're standing at a cross road • There's a choice you gotta make. _

_Chorus _

_I guess it's gonna have to hurt, • I guess I'm gonna have to cry, • And let go of some things I've loved, _

_To get to the other side, • I guess it's gonna break me down, • Like falling when you're trying to fly, • It's sad but sometimes moving on with the rest of your life, • starts with goodbye. _

_I know there's a blue horizon, • Somewhere up ahead, just waiting for me, • Getting there means leaving things behind, • Sometimes life's so bitter sweet. _

_Chorus_

_Time, time heals, • The wounds that you feel, • Somehow, right now. _

_Chorus to end_

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Edward's POV

It was the absolute, hardest moment of my existence. I had never wished for unconsciousness so much in my life. The moment she uttered those awful words, I went numb. It's so much worse when you have a photographic memory and can't forget anything no matter how much you want to.

------- (Flashback) -------

I remember getting up last night to go hunt and to talk to my siblings. They were still pretty ticked at me so they were of no help. They conveniently decided they were all going to go out. Alice would've stayed with me but wherever Jasper went, she usually went to. She thought her apologies and I nodded my head at her, letting her know that I understood, and with that they were off to do who knows what.

I flopped down on the couch so I could think about everything before I left to hunt. I needed to talk to Lizzy, but I needed to talk to Bella as well. Did I have feelings for Lizzy? It was clear that something was there but it wasn't nearly as powerful as with Bella. Whenever I kissed Bella there was always a spark. There was a connection; there was sheer passion. On the other hand, there was passion and a connection when I kissed Lizzy, but there was no spark that ignited me like with Bella.

Lizzy was something new, she was someone that I didn't have to be careful with. I didn't have to worry about constantly putting her life in danger. We could be happy together, hunting and traveling and everything. However, I wanted to do all that with Bella, more than with Lizzy. Of course, Bella's life was constantly in danger but would it all be worth it if we could stick it out? If I did end up changing her, then of course we'd be even happier.

My thoughts were interrupted as I remembered my thirst. I quickly left to go hunt and when I came home, I found that Bella had already left. Alice informed me that she had only left ten minutes ago but urged me to give her time to think. That's all she wanted and Alice made sure I gave that to her. She didn't even let me go to my classes. She said I couldn't be trusted and she was right. I would try and go see Bella at any chance I got.

Alice kept me entertained until I heard the truck tires coming up the gravel road. She was driving slower than usual. Then there were footsteps on my front porch and I heard my doorbell, she usually comes right in.

I opened the door to see her standing there in a t-shirt and jeans. Her usual attire but, damn… She was gorgeous, just like every day that I had seen her since we met. Without even knowing it, she made my decision to be with her. I needed to be with her. Whatever there was with Lizzy, it was nothing compared to with Bella. We can work this all out if she was willing to let me.

I smiled and held my hand out towards the couch, inviting her sit. My smile fell when I heard her speak in a small and fragile whisper.

"So… I guess I'm ready to talk about this," she said.

"Alright," I mumbled.

"So, I need you to tell me what happened."

I joined her on the couch and then turned to face her. I started by telling her what happened that day and what I was doing with Emmett and Jasper. I explained everything to her and couldn't help but notice how much pain she was in. I knew I was 'killing' her but I had to tell her everything. If we had even a little chance of making it past all of this, I'd have to at least get everything out there so there were no secrets.

After she asked me about that day, she then asked me about Alice's vision.

"What about Alice's vision? Why didn't you just tell me?" she asked.

I honestly didn't know what to say to her. I don't know why I did what I did. It was the wrong course of action clearly, but it was done and I couldn't change it.

"I didn't know how to tell you. I didn't want you to worry about something that I didn't think you'd have to. Alice and I were trying to so hard to prevent it but she had holes in her visions. We didn't know it'd be Lizzy that would cause this."

"You still should've told me Edward! I'm not sure what to even think about this whole thing. How could I ever trust you again to tell me the truth?"

"I know Bella, I messed up. We handled it wrong and I'm so sorry for that."

Then she asked the question that I didn't expect.

"Do you have feelings for her?" It looked as though she blurted her question out without thinking about it.

"What?" I asked as my eyes met hers.

"Do you have feelings for Lizzy?" she reiterated.

"I… I don't know. I'm confused about everything."

The moment I said, I wanted to take it back. I answered without thinking. I had agreed early on that I wouldn't lie to her but I didn't expect this question, even though I should've. It was a valid question but I couldn't take back my answer.

"Wrong answer Edward," she sighed.

I felt whatever chance we had of making it work go out the window with her reply.

"I can't do this anymore Edward. I don't feel like I can trust you anymore and the fact that your confused about Lizzy just hurts worse. I don't want to hurt anymore. Every time I look at you I see her and you and it just… hurts. I'm sorry Edward but…"

I reached my hands out to stop her from leaving.

"No, Edward."

"Bella please, don't do this."

"I hope she makes you happy Edward. I really do."

"No," I whispered.

She ran out of the house and slammed the door of her truck. I rushed out to the porch. I couldn't let her leave, I started to make my way to her truck but then I heard her whisper.

"Stay here Edward, please."

One day I thought I'd see her, with her daddy by her side and the violins would play "Here Comes the Bride". All of my hopes and dreams came crushing down to the ground with me as I fell to my knees, the epitome of a broken man. I watched as she drove away, all the while, crying broken, tearless sobs.

My family found me like that on the porch shortly after Bella had left. They took pity on my and stuck around to comfort me.

------- (Flashback ended) -------

I sighed as the memory came to a conclusion. I pushed play on my stereo, hoping to divert my attention. 'Let It Rock' came blaring from my speakers by Kevin Rudolf while I mentally cursed Emmett for messing with my stereo. It did however do the trick. The loud bass beats blared and blocked me from being capable of any thoughts other then listening to the lyrics. I pressed repeat on the remote and lay on the couch; analyzing every word of the song as well as the chords and everything else I could think to do to stop reminding myself of what a screw up I was.

_Here Comes Goodbye – Rascal Flatts_

_I can hear the truck tires coming up the gravel road • And it's not like her to drive that slow, nothings on the radio• Footsteps on the front porch, I hear my doorbell • She usually comes right in, now I can tell_

_Chorus_

_Here comes goodbye, here comes the last time • Here comes the start of every sleepless night_

_The first of every tear I'm gonna cry • Here comes the pain, Here comes me wishing things had never changed • And she was right here in my arms tonight, but here comes goodbye_

_I can hear her say I love you like it was yesterday • And I can see it written on her face that she had never felt this way • One day I thought I'd see her with her daddy by her side • And violins would play here comes the bride_

_Chorus_

_Why does it have to go from too good to gone? • Before the lights turn on, yeah and you're left alone • All alone, but here comes goodbye_

_Chorus_


	15. Unrequited Love

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, or Breaking Dawn books. They and they characters mentioned in this book are the creation of Stephanie Meyer. I also do not own any of the song lyrics that made be mentioned in this story. **

**Also, the links for the songs are on my profile page so you can get a feel for the mood I wanted to get across. **

**Lastly… please, please, please review. I like knowing what's going on in your heads so I know if I'm making things interesting. :) **

--------------------------------------------------------

Chapter Fifteen: Unrequited Love

Bella's POV

"You did what!?" Jake yelled.

"I broke up with him," I muttered through a flood of tears.

"As happy as I am about that, why?"

"He said he had feelings for Lizzy," I frowned.

Jake began shaking in anger.

"He did not say that."

I nodded and looked up at him. He was furious.

"Bella, go take a bath or something, I need to go calm down."

"Alright Jake," I sighed.

I got off the bed and walked to the bathroom. Without another word, Jake was out the door, letting it slam behind him.

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Jacob's POV

"That mother f-ing bloodsucker. I'll kill him… I'LL KILL HIM!" I yelled at my steering wheel as I drove towards the Cullen's house.

I was going to give that Leech a piece of my mind and I didn't care if Bella wanted me to or not. He's going to pay for breaking her like this.

I reached the house and was met on the porch by the physic vampire… what was her name again? Ally? Alison? Al…. ugh, forget it. I don't care that much.

"Listen, I need to speak to that blood… I mean Edward if you don't mind," I growled at her. I didn't care if she minded or not.

"I don't mind, but he's not here," she said in an indifferent tone.

"Where is he?" I asked, a little less agitated by her being cooperative.

"He's out hunting, but can I ask you a favor Jacob?"

_She's killing me with kindness, I thought._ "Maybe, it depends."

"Please don't kill him, Bella wouldn't like it."

"Right, I'll _try_ and keep that in mind."

I turned and started jogging through the woods, trying to follow the Bloodsucker's sickening, sweet smell. I caught a whiff of it and pounced in the air, transforming into my russet wolf form within seconds.

Seth was apparently in wolf form too, making his rounds.

"Jacob!! Where you been dude?"

"Not now Seth, I have some business to take care of."

"Fine, but call me later, I've got great news."

"Sure, sure," I replied.

With that, Seth morphed out of his wolf form to give me the privacy to attend to my business. I tried to keep my thoughts from him but I think he caught a few glimpses of what my 'business' was. Why else would he stop bugging me so easily?

I caught up to the vampire easily and morphed back into my human form. He was standing in the middle of a field looking around. A girl suddenly came out of the woods and rushed to his arms, hesitantly, he placed his arms around her, indecision written on his face.

I could have killed him right then if it wasn't for the brief moment of hesitation. There might be luck for his life yet.

The girl, who I assumed to be Lizzy, pulled away and took a step back.

"I missed you Eddie," she said.

Eddie? Pff… what a stupid name. I prefer Leech. Bloodsucker. Idiot…

"Yeah, look um… Bella and I are done. She broke up with me and I don't know what to do. I'm so lost without her."

"It'll be okay Eddie, I'm here. This is for the better. It wouldn't work with a human anyway. We'll get through this together and in time, you'll see I'm the only one you want." She spoke in a conniving and seductive voice. It made me sick.

I watched as Edward smiled a little in response to her statement. They then said there 'good-byes' and went separate ways. Edward obviously didn't know I was there, which was odd so he must have a lot on his mind. It was almost enough to make me feel sorry for him… till I remembered what he did to Bella.

I scowled at the memory and took off in Edward's direction. I caught up with him rather quickly because he wasn't going very fast. He must have intended it because he was at a walking pace by the time I morphed into human form and confronted him.

"What the heck is your problem Leech," I yelled.

"I don't know," he replied sadly.

"Give me two reasons why I shouldn't beat the crap out of you now."

"I can't. In fact, I'd love for you to beat the crap out of me."

"As much as I want to, it would be pointless if you didn't fight back."

Stupid Bloodsucker, I was feeling sorry for him and I shouldn't be. He's the one that hurt Bella and here I was contemplating taking his side for a second. Ugh… I'm getting too soft for my own good.

"So what are you waiting for Jacob? Aren't you going to say anything? To point out my flaws? To ridicule me?" He turned to face me and I stared at him in disbelief.

"I can't believe I'm saying this but I'm not sure what to do. I was ready to beat you down but now, I'm not sure what to do. You suck."

He smiled grimly and responded, "I know I do. I messed up Dog and I don't know what to do."

"Well what do you want Mosquito? Bella or that other leech?"

"I don't know. Bella wants nothing to do with me but Lizzy is willing to help me get through this."

"You're so stupid," I said. I was getting angry. How could he not choose Bella. They were Bella and Edward for monkey's sake.

"You're willing to throw away everything for someone you don't know. You strung Bella along for this? Making her believe you loved her? Who knew you could become so easily distracted. You're an idiot!" I yelled. I threw myself at him knocking him to the ground. He lay there, motionless, while I pinned him to the ground. I raised my fist and thrust it toward his face with all the force I had in me. His head lolled to the side, but he did not fight back. I repeated my tactic and he still did not flinch. Growing tired of my attempt to get him to fight back, I stood up.

"You'll regret doing this. You know you will and you refuse to do anything. So go run off to that stupid Siren and live your life in an undead state, because you'll never be happy without her."

With one last glance at his face, I turned and headed back to Bella's dorm. On the way, I called Seth to hear what his good news was.

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Bella's POV

Jacob came in through my dorm room door and glared at me. While he was gone, I went to the student union and bought more ice cream. Chunky chocolate chip cookies to be exact.

"Oh Bells," he sighed as he cleared used Kleenexes off my bed in order to sit beside me. It'll be alright you know. We got through this last time and we'll do it again. I promise you. I'll be here."

"Thanks Jake," I said. Why couldn't I fall in love with Jacob? We could be happy… couldn't we?

I looked deep into Jacob's eyes. They were pools of intensity as he leaned in. He was coming at me slowly.

What am I doing? I can't kiss Jacob. I just broke up with Edward and here I was, leaning in to Jacob's on-coming kiss.

Before I knew it, his lips were pressed against mine. They were warm and fervent, urgent even. I raised my hand to his cheek, forcing my lips to move; to feel something for Jake. Could we be happy if we tried?

I continued the kiss, desperate to try and connect to him in a way that could let me love him like he deserved.

His kisses became more passionate as he released my lips and placed kisses along my jaw line, down to my neck. At the same time he was gently pushing me backwards, onto the bed. I still didn't feel anything. There was no spark; there was no flush of warmth racing to my cheeks. There was nothing like there was with Edward.

A million thoughts raced through my head as Jake's hands gripped my waist, pulling me closer to him. After I was as close as I could be and he had me in a tight embrace, he rested his forehead against mine and whispered my name as if he was saying a prayer.

He lay with me the rest of the night. He held me close to him and would place a kiss on my head every once in awhile until he fell asleep. I didn't sleep any. Instead, I lay there trying to convince myself that I could work this out with Jake and pretend that I didn't miss Edward.


	16. Harder Than You Know

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, or Breaking Dawn books. They and they characters mentioned in this book are the creation of Stephanie Meyer. I also do not own any of the song lyrics that made be mentioned in this story. **

**Also, the links for the songs are on my profile page so you can get a feel for the mood I wanted to get across. **

**Lastly… please, please, please review. I like knowing what's going on in your heads so I know if I'm making things interesting. :) **

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Chapter 16: Harder Than You Know

?? POV

I never thought it would work so well. Everything went exactly the way she said it would. Edward and Bella were apart and the was nothing that could stop the plan from not working the way it's supposed to. Soon we will conquer the Collin's and my brother's death will be revenged.

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Edward's POV

After Jacob left me lying in the woods, I rolled onto my stomach and found the strength to get up. The Mutt is stupid but he is also much smarter than I will ever let him know. I was supposed to meet Lizzy back at the house but I couldn't do it. Not after my 'heart-to-heart' with Jacob. So I did the only thing that I knew to do. I went to get my Bella back. I won't let go without a fight.

I ran to my Volvo and pulled out of the garage. Half way down the drive way I realized I was out of gas and that I'd have to stop and fill up the car.

I pulled into Mutt's Gas Station and got out. Several people stared at me as I placed the nozzle in the tank. I guess the city isn't used to nice cars because a couple of people came over and struck up a conversation about 'how nice the car was' and 'how many mpg's it gets'. It took me a half an hour before I could leave the gas station and head to Bella's.

I was excited as I pulled into the parking lot. I could see Bella's window on the second floor. The light was still on, indicating she was home and awake. The smile that began to form on my face fell the second I heard that Jacob was in the room with her. I wouldn't be able to talk with him around. Regardless, I had to make my intentions known so I bounded up the stairs quickly. No one was around to see me so I didn't hold back on my speed.

I raised my hand to knock on the door but was assaulted by Jacob's thoughts. It took everything in me to not knock the door down and kill him.

"_Bella is really kissing me. I can't believe it. Gosh her lips taste good. I could kiss them all night. I wonder what she is thinking. She's an amazing kisser. I wonder if I can get her to lay down on the bed. Does she feel the same way that I do about this? I could just hold her like this all night. Can this really work?"_

I walked away from the door at that point which my head hung low. If this was what she wanted then I don't have a choice. I always told myself that if she outgrew me or wanted something more, I'd give it to her. I just didn't think it'd happen so quickly. Yet it did and I blew my chances with her. I was prepared to fight for her and convince her I was sorry. What I didn't expect was her to move on. How could I fight for us now?

I walked back to my car slowly. If I could cry I would but I can't so I set in my car sobbing so hard and wishing for the tears that would never come.

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Bella's POV

Waking up in Jacob's arms were different than in Edward's. His arms were warm and soft and if I could wiggle enough, I was able to break from his grasp. It was weird waking up and seeing the person holding me was still asleep. With Edward… well he can't sleep so he always knew when I was awake and asleep. I missed that…

Ugh! No! I cannot do this to myself. It's over and done. I can't be with Edward when he is causing me so much pain.

My internal battle was cut short as I heard Jacob stretching under the covers. He was not a quiet person in the morning… or at all for that matter. I was in the bathroom when I heard him wake up. I also hear him say my name, either out of happiness or concern of my whereabouts.

I exited the bathroom and saw him sitting on my bed still under the covers. He was watching some cartoon on the TV that I had never seen before but I sat down to join him. I was cold so I leaned into him. He in turn wrapped his arms around me and sighed.

"This is nice Bells," he whispered into my hair.

"Yeah," I said emotionless.

"What's wrong Bella?"

He reached for the remote and turned the TV off. He then picked me up and placed me on his lap so I was facing him.

"Nothing's wrong… really. I'm fine." I stressed but he didn't believe me.

"Whatever, what aren't you telling me?"

"It's about last night Jake," I sighed. I instantly felt more guilt than I was already feeling as I watched his face drop.

"You regret it don't you?" He replied sadly.

"No! I don't Jake, it was nice. The thing is…"

"I'm not the Vampire."

"I just need time Jake but… I want to try and make us work. I just needed you to know how I was feeling."

A smile appeared back on his face when he heard me tell him that I wanted to try and make things work for us. I don't think I've ever seen Jake so happy. I felt myself smile too but on the inside… I was drowning.

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Edward's POV

The week passed by slowly. I stayed in my room most of the time. Lizzy would visit me briefly, but her visits were coming less and less often. She and I would talk about where our relationship was going or what it was like to have the power to evolve into a human when we did talk.

I knew that I made a mistake in kissing Lizzy and her visits were proving it more and more. I hated myself for doing it, but I hated it even more that it was Jacob that was in her life now. I was mad at Bella for moving on so quickly. I was mad at Jacob for being the better person for her. I was mad at myself for not knowing what I had. I was mad all the time and it proved to be just as stressful of a week for my family.

They rarely stuck around the house. Mostly because they didn't approve of my decisions but also because I was stressing Jasper to Whit's end with my emotions. I sure was one messed up mother trucker.

The worst part was win Bella would call Alice, or vice versa. I'd hear them talking and it would drive me to insanity. I wanted to run down there and steal the phone from Alice and tell Bella to stop this nonsense and come back home. I had no right to though. This was all my doing and I'd be damned if I blamed any of it on her.

I looked over at my wall calendar. I plopped down onto my couch and closed my eyes.

"Freaking Saturday," I sighed. One whole freaking week without Bella and it felt like her birthday all over again. I was in the middle of developing a time machine in my head when Alice busted through my door.

"Not now Alice, I'm busy building a…" the look on her face stopped my thoughts dead in their tracks.

"Shit…" I exclaimed and bolted out the door with her behind.

_Harder Than You Know – Escape the Fate_

_You said this could only get better • There's no rush cause we have each other _

_You said this would last forever • But now I doubt if I was your only lover _

_Are we just lost in time? • I wonder if your love's the same •Cause I'm not over you _

_Chorus:_

_Baby, don't talk to me • I'm trying to let go • Not loving you is harder than you know • Cause girl you're driving me so crazy _

_How can I miss you if you never would stay? • If you need time I guess I'll go away (I'll go away) • Inside me now there's only heartache and pain • So where's the fire? You've become the rain _

_Are we just lost in time? • I wonder if your love's the same • Cause I'm not over you _

_Chorus_

_And if you don't want me than • I guess I'll have to go (I guess I'll have to go) • Not loving you is harder than you know • (Yeah) _

_So I'll make the call • And I'll leave today • I'm gonna miss you cause I love you baby _

_And I'll make the call • I'm leaving today • And leaving always drives me crazy • Leaving always drives me crazy _

_Chorus _

_And if you don't want me than • I guess I'll have to go • Not loving you is harder than you know • Girl You're driving me so crazy _

_Chrus_


	17. A Means To An End

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, or Breaking Dawn books. They and they characters mentioned in this book are the creation of Stephanie Meyer. I also do not own any of the song lyrics that made be mentioned in this story. **

**Lastly… please, please, please review. I like knowing what's going on in your heads so I know if I'm making things interesting. :) **

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Chapter 17: A Means To An End

Bella's POV

The week was slow and intolerable. Jacob had left Tuesday and we talked on the phone a lot. I promised that I would try and make this work for us and that was exactly what I was trying. Every night I would call him when I was ready for bed and he was running his rounds. I would tell him how my day went and how much homework I had and I would tell him how much I missed being with him.

No matter how many times that we talked or how happy I tried to sound, there wasn't a day that went by where he didn't ask me if this was what I wanted. He could feel my hesitance with him and he knew I was still thinking about Edward. It was heartbreaking how understanding he was being. He didn't even try and press the fact that he wanted us to be official. He said that I could decide that when I was ready and we'd move at my pace. That was the Jacob that I remembered; the understanding, fun loving Jacob. Not the archenemy of my boyfriend that had a face mimicking that of Sam Uley's. No, this was the Jacob I grew up making mud pies with. He was my Jacob and it would be so wonderful if I could love him.

It wasn't the same as loving Edward though and I hated myself for it. I flopped down on my bed, muffling my emotions into a pillow. After I was done biting my pillow, I glanced over at the calendar hanging on the wall. It had been an entire week since I had left Edward on his porch. Somehow I managed to last a week without falling into a state of cataclysmic disarray.

*Knock Knock*

I turned my head to face the door.

"Who is it?"

"It's me Bells."

A slow and happy grin spread across my face as my voice recognition kicked in. I ran to the door and flung it open, rushing right into the firm arms of my father.

"Bells."

"Dad," I sighed. "What are you doing here!?"

"Thought you might need me."

I smiled as I ushered him in.

He looked around my room and nodded his approval of the décor.

"Alice," I said, motioning with my hands.

"So, Jacob told me what happened."

"Oh… he did?"

I walked over to the bed and sat down while Charlie took a chair and pulled it up in front of me. I avoided his stares by staring at my twiddling fingers.

"Yeah," he sighed, "Can't say that I blame him."

My head shot up as I looked at him in disbelief at what had just come out of his mouth. "What?"

"Oh come on Bells, did you really think he'd want to be with you forever?"

"Well I…" I stuttered.

"I'm so much prettier than you and I'm what he wants."

My heart stopped as I watched the face and the body of Charlie dissolve into Lizzy.

"What are you doing here?" I stuttered between breaths as my fight-or-flight instincts kicked in and my instincts were telling me to run.

I forced my languid body to start running to the door but it was no use. She caught me after two steps and threw me back onto the bed. She retrieved some belts from the closet and kept me there. My life was beginning to flash before my eyes. It was James all over again and this time, I didn't feel like someone would come to rescue me.

"I bet you're wondering why I care about a measly little human like you. Well, it's simple really. Your little boyfriend killed my brother James. He wasn't my biological brother of course, but we were made by the same mentors and Victoria, by mate, was my sister-in-law. She came to me after James' death, telling me of a plan she had to wipe you and the Cullen's out. It was brilliant I thought, but as you know, the Newborn War was not a success and Victoria did not make it. She also had a plan in case it failed, which is why I'm here. I am the contingency plan. It's was not as extravagant, but it was effective. I was to break apart you and Eddie and then kill you; an eye for an eye. So here we are Bella, and all I have to do is kill you. Just a knife through the heart and it will be all over and my brother and sister-in-law will finally be avenged."

I found it strangely relieving that it would all be over soon. She wouldn't torture me or try and 'suck my blood'. It would be quick and simple and it would be for Edward. She wouldn't touch him after I was gone. There would be no need and she would not survive against the Cullen's. It was an easy out for the both of us, only there would be only one survivor.

I refused to cry at this last moment of my life. I refused to beg for my life. I refused to regret it for if I did, I would not have had Edward in my life, even if it was the death of me.

I watched as she transformed back into a human, taking the image of my father again.

"Obviously, I want to resist the urge to drink your blood after I spill it. I want you to suffer for what you have done to my family. Good-bye Bella."

With her final good-bye, I closed my eyes and refused to watch as my father's image stabbed a knife through my heart. I silently said my good-byes, though no one would hear them and prayed to God that Edward knew that I loved him and that I was sorry. I would always love him.

The pain was excruciating as the knife plunged into me. She missed my heart by an inch, allowing me a longer and painful life. I watched as she let go of the knife, leaving it in me.

She wore a smug smile as she walked to the window and jumped out without another word. I lolled my head to the side, trying carefully not to move too much. My eyes fixed on the photo of Edward and me in my father's kitchen on my birthday. It was my favorite picture and I couldn't help but smile at the memory. I would make my last moments as happy as I could, regardless of the pain welling in my chest. I let my eyes close as I tried to remember more of Edward and Jacob… and… Charlie and… Renee and …

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Edward's POV

When I was 8, my mother and I went to a wedding. It was extravagant and elegant and everything a wedding should be. The bride blushed as her groom walked her down the aisle after they were pronounced husband and wife. At the reception, I watched as he held her close and kissed her gently on the cheek. I proceeded to watch as my father got up and asked if my mother would like to dance. She accepted and they walked hand-in-hand to the dance floor. My father gingerly placed a hand on my mother's back and took the other firmly in his other. With a loving smile to each other, they began to waltz. He twirled her around, laughing and smiling throughout the dance. I remembered thinking that I when I found my true love, that I would dance with her at our wedding just like my mother and father did. I would hold her in my arms and never let her go.

After being alone for so long, I had finally found Bella. And then I threw it all away twice. Once, I had done so to keep her safe from my world of not-so-mythical creatures. I had come back because we needed each other to survive and it became more and more evident as the months pass. Just when I had begun to think we were in the right place and going along so well, I messed up. I became infatuated with Lizzy and became confused on what it was that I wanted. Only after Bella left me did I realize that I already had everything that I wanted.

When Alice rushed through my door, I saw the vision that she had. I saw Lizzy in her room, standing over her with a knife. I saw her as she plunged it threw her chest in the form of Charlie. I saw it all and I watched as it all slipped out of my hands.

I had never run so fast in my life as I did trying to reach Bella. I had to save her. I wasn't ready to let her go, I needed her and she had to be with me.

But it was not to be; we were too late; Bella lay on her bed with the knife lodged in her chest. Careful not to move her, I sat beside the bed, frantically trying to wake Bella with my voice. She wasn't dead yet, but she was close.

"Ed…ward…" she breathed.

I looked at her and forced myself to smile.

"I'm so sorry Bella. I never meant…"

"It's okay Edward," she said, forcing a weak smile.

"Bella, I'm going to fix this. You're going to be alright."

"You don't have to lie to me this time Edward. I know that it's over."

"She's right. There's not enough time Edward," Alice spoke under her breath, only loud enough for me to hear.

"There has to be," I whispered back.

"I… love… you... Edward," Bella spoke between breaths.

"I love you too love," I responded, my voice cracking.

A stream of blood flowed down her chin as she attempted to speak.

"Edward," Alice whispered. "We have to go; Jacob is on his way here."

"What's he doing here," I yelled.

"He's coming to see her Edward, we have to go. We can't be found here."

"Please don't be mad at Jacob. He's a good friend." Bella urged. The sentence was too much for her and it sent her into a coughing fit.

After a few ragged coughs, the fit subsided and she looked at me with glazed eyes.

"Promise me something."

"Anything," I whispered through broken sobs.

"Stay with the Cullen's Edward, live. Promise me you will live."

"I promise," I whispered and I knew that I would keep that promise, no matter how much pain it brought me.

"You have to go now Edward. I'll always be with you." She whispered, closing her eyes; tears gently flowing and mixing with the blood. "I love you."

That was the last thing she said. I screamed in a fit of range, trying to urgently wake her. Her heart was working on its last beat and I couldn't let go. It couldn't end this way.

"Edward no, you can't." Alice urged. "You can't do it, there isn't any time."

"There has to be," I yelled through gritted teeth, glaring at her.

I plunged my teeth into Bella's neck, releasing the venom to flow through her veins. I then licked the bites, healing them quickly so the marks would not show. I continued to bite at the major arteries, trying to force the venom to flow. It was no use, her heart had stopped and there was nothing I could do.

I stood up and stumbled back against her desk, sending a picture frame crashing to the floor.

"No. No… No… NNNOOOO….."

"We have to go," Alice sobbed, grabbing my arm. She pulled me out the window and forced me to run to the house. As I was leaving, I heard Jacob coming down the hall.


	18. With Love There Is Hope

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, or Breaking Dawn books. They and they characters mentioned in this book are the creation of Stephanie Meyer. I also do not own any of the song lyrics that made be mentioned in this story. **

**Lastly… please, please, please review. I like knowing what's going on in your heads so I know if I'm making things interesting. :) **

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Chapter 18: With Love There Is Hope

Edward's POV

The wind brushed through my hair as I stood on the hilltop looking down onto the funeral while my family stood beside me. I couldn't find it in me to get closer to the ceremony. It would be too hard to be so close to her and not hold her in my arms.

After the crowd had left, I fell to my knees in front of her headstone. Carlisle placed his hand on my shoulder to comfort me. She was gone.

----------------------

It's been a week since I left Bella in her room. Five days since the funeral and over three week since I last fed. I was starting to become weak and delusional, but I couldn't bring myself to leave my room.

My room was a disaster. The books and the music were no longer on the shelf. Instead, I had packed them all up into boxes. There were packing peanuts, bubble wrap, garbage, and boxes all over my room. I was determined to get rid of everything that reminded me of her. Coincidentally, that was my whole room. I promised Bella I would live on with my family and I intended on doing so.

I heard a soft rapping on my door and heard the thoughts of the owner.

"Edward," Rosalie whispered.

I didn't answer her but turned to look out the window instead.

"Are you okay? I'm sorry everything turned out this way."

"It's okay Rosalie. Will you do me a favor though?"

"Anything Edward."

"Will you please…?"

"Yes?"

"Will you please leave me alone," I whispered. "I appreciate you checking on me, I'm just not ready to talk."

"Okay Edward, I'll tell them."

"Thank you."

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Jacob's POV

I've done a lot of things in my life that I'm not proud of. In fact, everything I have done since I had become a werewolf put me to shame. However, sometimes you have to do what you have to do. So I did just that. One day they would forgive me. One day they would understand.

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Edward's POV

If I closed my eyes tight enough and shut out everything around me, I could see Bella. I could see her beautiful face, her pale skin and her long brown curls. I could hear her laugh and her voice; everything. I remembered it all. The first day we met, the first day we kiss, the first day I lay in bed and held her why she slept. I remember holding her in Italy and watching her graduate and the way her face lit up when she saw that darn Dog.

She loved that Dog and because I couldn't find it in me to hate him anymore, I let it be. I saw him at the funeral, setting by her father. He carried her casket and spoke of her memories. Later I went up and shook his hand; that was all I could do. For Bella's sake, I had to make peace with him before we parted ways. I felt I owed her that. He too must have felt the need to do so. He shook my hand in return and nodded his head.

I closed my eyes even tighter as the memories began to flood in. Her voice, her laughter, her skin, her smell… it was all coming back to me.

"Oh Bella," I whispered.

"What is it love?" she spoke back.

I smiled at hearing her voice. In my mind she was walking towards me with a beautiful smile on her face.

"I miss you."

"I miss you too."

"Are you happy?" I asked.

"Yes. I am happy, I'm looking at you."

I smiled as I opened my eyes. I looked over at my desk where I had placed her favorite picture of us.

"I love you," I said.

"I love you too Edward." Out of the corner of my eye I saw her standing there by the window.

"You look beautiful," I whispered. "I must be delusional. How can I see you?"

"When was the last time you hunted Edward?"

"Three weeks," I replied.

"You have to go."

"I will."

I took a step closer; her beauty drawing me in.

She smiled and took a step towards me in return.

"Go Edward."

"I don't want to leave you," I said, taking another step towards her. One more step and I could hold her in my arms.

"I'll see you again. I promise."

I reached out to touch her but she was gone. All that was left behind was the smell of flowers that was wafting in through the window.

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"I saw her Alice. She was standing right here in my room talking to me. It was like I could smell her."

"I'm sorry Edward. I know this is hard for you but you have got to go hunt. It's making you weak."

She was right of course. I knew I was getting weak, but now I was afraid to leave my room in case Bella came back.

"She might come back, I have to stay here."

"Edward, she's gone. She's not coming back. We watched her die. We were at her funeral. She's gone."

"But what if…"

"No. Edward this isn't healthy. I want her back to but…," she stopped and softened her face. "I can't see her anymore. That has to mean something. It's just a white slate when I search for her future."

"I'm sorry son. Sometimes things happen and you can't control them," Carlisle said, pulling me into a tight embrace.

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Jacob's POV

It's been two months since Bella's funeral. The city of Forks had returned to normal; except for Charlie of course. I don't think he'll ever be okay. Luckily he has Sue Clearwater to help him through it. They're really helping each other and it's comforting to know they have each other.

My thoughts were interrupted as I heard someone approaching. I turned to look at my visitor.

"It's time Jacob. I have to leave. I can't stay here anymore."

"Why not?" I responded.

"You know why I can't stay. It's not right. I have to go back."

"Bella, you can stay here with me. We can be happy." I pleaded with her to stay.

"Oh Jacob," she sighed. "Look at me. I can't stay. He needs me."

She was right; she had to go back to Edward. She needed him and it showed.

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Bella's POV

Life was hard to adjust too after Lizzy's attack. There were so many rules that I had to adjust to at first, to keep me safe. I knew the reason behind those rules and why I needed to stay in La Push, but it didn't make it any easier to be away from Edward. I told Jacob that I would try to make us work, but everything had changed.

And Edward… he was going crazy. He wasn't hunting or leaving his room. When I visited him, he thought I was an illusion. My Edward needed me and I would help him anyway I can.

I told Jacob and the rest of the pack goodbye. Jacob had finally remembered some good news that Seth had told him about and he was supposed to pass on. That was the night that we kissed so it kind of got pushed to the wayside. Regardless, when I returned to La Push I was introduced to Seth's imprint Hannah. They were an adorable couple and I was thrilled to have spent time with them for a bit.

After I hugged Jacob good-bye and made him promise he'd keep in touch, I set out for Alaska to find my family.

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Edward's POV

Life had become routine. I'd go to school in the morning, come home and hide out in my room until I needed to hunt. No one tried to make a conversation; they pretty much let me be. Alice came in a couple of times and just sat with me. She never said a word and never had a thought. It was a comfortable silence and we both reveled in it.

Today, my calendar had shown me it had been two months since Bella's death. It was a hard day and it was nearing its end. I decided that I should probably hunt and so I did.

I ran at top speed though the forest, the wind and the snow whipping across my skin. In one of my hunts I had come across a meadow that was similar to the one back in Forks. The meadow was a comforting place. I could go there and lie in the grass and just think. After I hunted, I returned to the meadow to think. While I was lying there, it began to snow harder. I closed my eyes and let the snowflakes land on my skin. They did not melt but stayed frozen. If I stayed long enough, I would be covered by a blanket a snow. It was an intriguing thought to be hidden from the world for awhile.

I let my thoughts wonder to Bella as I lay in the snow. She would hate this. It always drove her crazy when they would have snowball fights at school and she hated having to camp in the snow during the war. She was predictable when it came to the weather and I missed that.

"What are you thinking about?"

My eyes shot open to see Bella standing in front of me.

"You," I said. I stared at her in amazement. She was beautiful with the snow falling and caressing her skin.

"Why me?" she asked.

"Because I miss you so much and you had to go and die on me," I stated angrily, getting up off of the ground.

I looked at her apologetically as I watched her face fall.

"I'm sorry, I just don't understand why I can see you and I don't understand why I couldn't save you and I just… don't understand anything."

To my surprise, she laughed. Her laughter was beautiful and it chimed like church bells. I smiled and walked to her. I hesitated as I reached my hand out to touch her face, unsure of what would happen. Would she disappear? Would my hand go through her? Would I really be able to touch her?

"Go ahead Edward, it's me. I'm really here."

I reached out and touched her cheek.

"You can't be here. I watched you die. I was at your funeral. How are you here?"

"You saved me Edward. I don't know how it worked, but you did. Jacob found me and I was beginning to go through the transformation. He didn't know what to do so he called Charlie and told him I had been killed. He made arrangement s for me to be sent in a coffin back to Forks. He pressed to have the funeral as soon as possible. After the funeral he went back and got me out of the coffin and took me to La Push. I woke in his room and he explained what happened as best as he could. He hoped I would understand. He said he did it for my family so they would have closure and to preserve our world mythical. He knew that our secrets could be exposed but he also hoped that we could make it work. It couldn't work out with us though. I'm a vampire and he's a werewolf. How's that supposed to work?" she laughed at her last comment.

"But it also wouldn't work because I am in love with you Edward. I want to spend the rest of my existence with you."

I picked her up in my arms and swung her around. It really was her. The venom had spread just as I had hoped and Alice couldn't see her because she was in La Push. It was clever of Jacob but that didn't mean I liked him. I'd have to call him and give him a piece of my mind… as well as thank him.

That day my life with Bella had finally begun. She was finally with me as a vampire and now, there was nothing stopping us from living happily ever after.


	19. Epilogue

Chapter 18: Epilogue

Bella's POV

Life with Edward was everything that I had hoped it would be. It was exciting, romantic, and surprising. Our love for one another has continued to grow over the past ten years. We still live in Alaska with the rest of the Cullen's. Edward and I have a family even. We decided that we wanted to adopt a child. Obviously it's a crazy idea but one that has worked well for us. We adopted a little girl and named her Renesmee. What was even more surprising was that Jacob imprinted on her. She now lives with them in La Push, happily growing more in love with Jacob. I couldn't be happier right now. Edward is even happy with Jacob. He's proven to be an excellent match for our daughter and cannot wait to see what life has in store for her and the rest of our family.

By the way, we did have our revenge on Lizzy but that's another story :)


End file.
